With Liam we will have an open adoption. The only contact he has though is with his grandfather. His grandfather has been the only stable force in this little guys 5 years on this earth. I am 100% willing to continue the contact with grandpa for as long as Grandpa is willing. Heck I simply see it as more extended family. Liam and I discussed inviting Grandpa to his birthday party (which is months away lol). I even discussed with his social worker (she brought it up) Changing Liams actual name. If any of his classmates were to find out his birth name he would be mercilessly teased for the rest of his school days. Anyway the SW and I discussed changing Liams middle name to his grandpa's name to give him that connection to his birth family. I think it is a perfect idea.
Weird thing I had a dream last night that Grandpa called. See Grandpa is out of town and has been out of town since before Liams last family kicked him out. Yes kicked him out. I see the way they did things and the motives as not noble or heck parental at all! Grandpa has no idea that his grandson is not in the place he thought he was safe and loved. I am not afraid Grandpa will want to take him from us. He has already been deemed 'not a suitable placement' for Liam. I guess I am afraid that because of this last family he will not like us or be slower to trust us. That make sense? Anyway I have had the urge to call him all day long. I do not want to until I talk to Liams worker though. Heck not even 100% positive he is home yet.
So Monday I will be making a call to the worker to see what is going on and if I should call or not.
On another note. The three boys Frankie, Pierce and Lance leave approx. mid week. DH and I have a running 'bet'. He says we will not make it to the weekend without a placement. I say two weeks.
My proud mama moment. Frankie won an award at school. It was for, courage! He really felt special and I think it is wonderful he was nominated for his classroom.
About Me
- Gina
- Here I am now... The mother of 4 wonderful boys, present and former foster mom to seven boys!! True at times there is an overload of testosterone and fart humor...but I muddle through well enough hehe. I am spoiled too, there is no lack of gentlemen opening doors, car doors etc... of course that balances out with no lack of bad aim in the bathroom! The news that shocked the world....? We are expecting a baby girl in March 2008!! I am a stay at home mom. I work more now than I did when I held a "real" job. Hubby is in the Navy. I cannot convey how proud I am of him. He is truly the man of my dreams and a better husband than I ever thought I deserved. Well that is the general overview of me ;) enjoy the blog. Don't know something? want to know? ASK. I love comments to my ramblings too.
3 comments:
Do you know why Grampa isn't an appropriate placement? If you don't know, you need to find out.
Grandpa's age and willingness to keep up with a high energy little one on top of his work schedule made him 'not suitable' he was the one who withdrew.
I hope Liam will be able to stay with you forever. Your story reminds me of a conversation I was having yesterday with one of the two little girls who I am an unnofficial foster parent to. They had been in foster care for several years before going to live with their dad. We were in the car, and the little one was telling me about all these different foster placements she'd been in and how she missed all these people. The last foster parents had planned on adopting the kids, and my little one actually thought she was already adopted, and then was sent back to her birth dad. She said, "I wanted to stay with them! They told me I could come visit, but I never have! Can you take me to visit them?" The reason she hasn't visited them is because I don't think her dad will allow it, but I told her I wasn't sure because I don't know where they live. She then asked about her old caseworker and asked why the caseworker no longer visited her. I explained that it was her job to help children in foster care, and that since the girls lived with their dad and the caseworker knew they were safe, she no longer came to see them. This conversation was all happening in the car on the way back to their house... and when we got there, Maggie didn't want to get out and was saying, "But I'll miss you!" I explained for the zillionth time that day that I was going to see her again in 3 days... but then it occurred to me... why should she believe me? Everyone else said similar things, and none of them are around anymore.
Such a tough break for little kids, isn't it...
- Angel
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