so there ;p

The boys went to their visits in THEIR clothes (I find this ridiculous) the pants were too short on the oldest shirt too small on the youngest but hey I have to keep up with the wishes of the biomom right?? There was also the incident that biomom wouldn't go back into the visit room so I was "hid" in an empty cubicle.
We (DS#3 & I) went to a local park and had a lot of fun.... OK an hours worth was what I could stand haha then off to Costco in the remaining hour. So I got a lot done. Then I picked the boys up :)
I am trying really hard to not distance myself emotionally from these boys. It is not fair to them and it will make my life hell too.
Tomorrow I have a foster parent support group meeting. Heck it counts toward my training hours so it won't kill me ;)
I am exhausted and the weekend is rapidly approaching no rest for the wicked.

they took it ok

Frankie gave me a very disappointed "whyyyyyyyy" but I explained they are going to live with their family member etc..... they took it alright.
My middle son talked to me later and asked if next time we could "just adopt...and maybe a girl....but just one"
I have a killer sinus headache. I am sure the crying earlier did not help at all
Now to get ready for the visit tomorrow. I have all of THEIR clothes they can wear and that will be a fun fight when they want to wear something else. But as long as "Mom" is happy right?? Ugh

Sad day

I got the phone call today the boys will be going to family next month.
I am heartbroken. I am on one hand elated they will be with family but on the other hand I am upset they are leaving here.

Let me bitch that the mom COMPLAINED that the kids were not wearing "the clothes she bought" and that her youngest son had underwear on that were too small. Umm lady those underwear ARE the ones you sent him with. And oh my goodness they are dressed in other clothes. SO SUE ME! Old Navy and Gap I think, same things my kids wear. Crazy woman

bunkbeds.....

'Tis that time agan. Time to upgrade another room to bunkbeds.
I got this one for the middle boys room


It is a full (double) on top of full bunk bed and we got the optional twin trundle bed

For the oldests room his furniture set is all in cherry stain. So I am down to two choices both full/full bunk beds.
This one (has an optional twin trundle)




Or this one without the trundle again also in cherry



What do you think? I know where I am leaning toward but I am still undecided. The cost is a little more for the bed with the trundle of course

Everything

Is a lesson.....
Today Frankie asked me when I got Gunther, our German Shepherd. I explained he had a family before but something happened and they left him all alone in an apple orchard and he was just eating apples to survive. We found hm at the shelter and took him home to be a part of our family. He said "Like us!! he was lucky to come here" I told him that we were the lucky ones that we are able to share a life with Gunther. Just like I feel very lucky to share our home and our lives right now with him and his brothers. He asked about the other German Shepherd so we told his rescue story too. Then the conversation went to bugs or something like that hahaha BUT I think it was an awesome connection he made.
Tomorrow is speech class for Pierce He is doing so well. I cannot wait to hear about his progress tomorrow.

milk and frogs

Oh that title begs to have a reference to the frog in a blender joke... hehehe

I took the youngest 3 to the store. We picked up milk and eggs. I am up to about 5 gallons of milk a week and a dozen eggs per breakfast (or for egg sandwhiches like this afternoon) I will have to purchase the 5 dozen eggs at Costco weekly. I took out miniman, Lance and Pierce out today. Since they were so good I told them they could pick out another aquatic frog. Well that one frog turned into 6 tetras and three guppies as well. but the fish tank s great fun for the boys to look at and play 'find the _____ fish'
I am beat so I am going to head to bed.

Well....thank you

We went out to our favorite local mexican food place. All of the boys were spectacular! One lady stopped by our table and commented we had a wonderful family and very well behaved children :) I smiled huge and told her thank you. Her husband said earlier there was a family with 6 girls and we should arrange some marriages lol

dinner

We are taking the family out tonight. Our big ol' party of 8 hehe I just do not want to cook tonight. So out for cheap but wonderful food. Great little family friendly place too. Wish us luck. Frankie and Pierce have been doing much better when we go out in public so I am ready to give this a try.

Call

well while we were all out front. I was cleaning the car and we were blowing bubbles and riding bikes etc. I come back in to a message on the machine about a placement. A 5 year old boy. First thing everyone knows we are full lol. But apparently we are "good with boys". Yeah .... Well I called back and of course no one was there. But I did leave my message so we will see. Again there is such a need for foster and adoptive homes but yeah they cannot all come here hahaha

One reply

We have put in an inquiry on two children. One 12 year old boy and one 3 year old girl. The one worker they had listed for the boy is no longer his worker and the actual current worker has not replied. The girls worker got back to me only to state the things she saw as wrong with ths girl. So I requested some claifications that will help us make our final decision to even get more info.
I still feel extremely terrible that while I am working with the boys and preparing them for when they go back to live with their mom and dad (or mom and boyfriend or Dad or whatever dynamic).....I am hoping that there is no family that comes forward and that the state moves for TPR and asks us to adopt these boys. I am the lowest scum I swear.

oh yeah

The late issue is resolved. No worries. As I said all it took was posting about it lol

Proud of Pierce

His speech therapy was today again the speech therapist said he was making amazing strides and flyng through things. She says that some children spend months on thngs he has flown through. She said that has lead her to believe hs issues were completely environmental.

Pingo!

****this post sponsored by Pingo




Nah I didn't mean Bingo ;) Pingo is a calling card ( prepaid calling card provider) service. We have been through the whole virtual International rechargeable phone calling card service & calling card thing with dh being in this or that country tryng to call home. We had one card once that was usable for about 5 minutes because the fees ate up all of the money on the account. Talk about a pain in the butt. It seems that so many companies have a hidden agenda or fine print to just take all of your money. From what I have seen Pingo is pretty good. Add onto that an affiliate program that pays you what? $15 per referral? yeah that is a good thing

I almost cried

I know in this sea of testosterone I live in I was very close to being VERY girly. The reason is good though. Frankie told me "Goodnight, I love you" He turned around and smiled when he saw the look on my face (I am guessing). This is HUGE!! OK I will be on cloud nine about that one for a while.

Celebrities....date one... it is the in thing haha

Ok there are a few celebrities I would love to have a date with. I know I know "but Gina you are a happily married woman" I know but let's face it I have as much chance to date a celebrity as I do a meteor falling on our house. Slim to none... yup. I know this I have faced it. I am OK with it but a girl is allowed to dream hehe.
So I admit sometimes dreams do come true for some people. There is this site out there now where you can win a date with a celebrity. Every time I type that I think of the movie Win a Date With Tad Hamilton. OK time to reign back in my train of thought before it derails. Anyway folks can enter a to win a date with Actress, Mirelly Taylor who has appeared on movies such as Kiss Me Again and Serving Sara and television shows including “Las Vegas”, “Punk’d”, and “Numb3rs”. No SHE isn’t my dream celebrity date (sorry to kill those thoughts ;) ) I think she is very pretty and will make some fan very happy to be able to have a date with her. What an opportunity. I am looking forward to checking out the winning submission. There are some spectacularly creative people out there.
Free videos at GoFish.com

My Mom

She knew we had these boys as fosters. She is aware of us trying to adopt....eventually (probably not these boys but still...). Tonight she was sitting n my room with my as I was getting the two babies ready for bed. Frankie came in and started talking to me. We have chats ofte about almost anything under the sun. today it was about how the oldest is not 'the dad's' "born from him (his explination) son". How he didn't know because he treats him like hs son and how someone does not have to be related to love one another. Then we started to talk about God. Pretty deep stuff for a seven year old ;) anyway my mom was about in tears when Frakie was done chattng. She said how you can hear about the kids and know they are in foster care but your whole attitude about them changes when you meet them and see how much they thirst for human contact and interaction. She worked in the jails and in dispatch like I did. She saw/heard about kids coming vrom some crappy situations. But that first meeting to seeing them thriving n a foster home. so much different. She sees how they react in a normal... though busy house. The problens they are facing in attitude, behavioral,social and speech etc. She said she cannot help to be angry with the bioparents and what they have done to these kids. She equated what she was feeling with the feelings of hate,disgust, and utter disbelief of animal abuser on Animal precibct on Animal Planet.
She just could not understand why poeple do what they do

haha

DH was being proud papa at work and was showing pictures of the boys at work. One of hs co-workers said that the second youngest (Lance the youngest foster son) doesn't look like him, but the rest do LOL

I laughed and told dh I was sorry he had to find out ths way, but Lance was not his biological son. hahaha

It seems like just last month....

that I got my dear litle Frankie now he is SEVEN!! Oh wait I did just get hm last month hehe But he is such a big boy now.
Visitation with biomom and biodad today. They were gracious enough to buy him such illustrious gifts as a guitar and an electronic keyboard. I did draw the line at Frankie playng the guitar in the car like his biomom sad he could. yeah NO not going to happen. The went into the visits nice and calm (but yeah still little boys)came out the little hellions that first came here..... hitting and yelling ugh.....
I do have a huge gem for the day though. I made strawberry shortcake for dessert. Frankie said once he loved them. We put a candle in it and everything. He asked me "How did you know I liked this?" I said "because you told me sweetie when you first got here" he said with a huge smile "You remembered?" "Yes sweetie I remembered" to which I got the reply "sweeeeeet"
He ble out his candle and ate his dessert. Then came present time. Yeah I will never forget it. He got a TMNT toy, a book, PJ's, a towel and Pokemon cards. Frankie turned to me and sad "Wow how did you make my birthday wish come true so quick?" AWWWWWWWWWW All he wished for for his brthday was pokemon cards. But the fact I was able to grant his wish.... well that is just too darn cool and one heck of a memory for me.

the plan

is for the boys to be in foster care for 6 months....give or take of course depending on their parents and if any family member wants to take them in. One month has already passed....where does time go? There were times that I thought 6 months was forever. But it does not seem like long at all. I am not going to be OK when it comes time to say goodbye.
Is it bad that somewhere in the back of my mind I wish that they would stay? I suppose that is normal. I do hope though they do not lose their mom and dad. That thought is also heartbreaking. They do love them so much. I also know they, both the parents and the boys are going through much more heartbreak and turmoil.
Dangit where is that crystal ball when you need it?
I am still looking in our local paper for any news on the court cases. Nothing yet. So we Will see
I am still in limbo. I thought today about enquiring about two sibling groups but with the future uncertain I do not want to get my hopes up to be turned down because of our full house and not knowing how long it Will be full.

New one

Frankie told me today he hopes he stays here. He says he likes it here and he likes his school and his frends and...... 'the family'. Wow that is different. Not even sure how to take that one either. Hey it is all new to me ;)
Dang it all to heck I really am growing attached to these boys!

My mixed bag

Ok first to get it out there. I am late. Yeah "late" Enough to make me wonder. My body is way out of whack so who knows. Now that I posted this though I should start. No stick to pee on here or I would! lol Because as soon as I say anything about it or take a test I start.... I did tell dh a couple of days ago he laughed and said "it would be perfect timing and God has a sense of humor" yeah no kidding... With our house full that would be hillarious.
OK Pierce's first speech therapy appointment was today. The speech therapist said even from the evaluation he has made a lot of progress. We began to talk about Frankie and she said the same about him. How much progress he is making etc. So I AM doing something right and the boys are thriving in my care :)
On the way out this morning I stepped on a shoe left on the stairs and took a tumble down half of our stairs. Lovely if the lateness is actually something I will be worried. I know I sprained a finger and my pinky toe and I bruised my knee and hip. UGH I feel like a clutz! I also dropped everything I have touched today and spilled milk when I poured it (though I did not cry over it)
I deposited a check into my account last week and unlike me I did not wait for it to clear. I spent the money yeah well the deposit bounced! Setting in motion a chain of horrendous fincial blunders.
Good news. I got two weeks of reembursement for the two older boys! If that check bounces the state is in huge trouble LOL

torn

I am torn. I love these boys I really do. We never intended to do straight foster care. Only foster to adopt. But we took these boys in. I knew when takng them in that adoption was probably not on the horizon. Part of me feels that it was destiny that they came here. I was meant to help them (yeah corny work with me here).
BUT a part of me...that same part of me that browses available childrens listings... want to adopt and not have the uncertainty of fostering. Maybe that is just it? The uncertainty that is killing me? It has been a few days short of a month. The only thing I hear about the case is how uncooperative the parents are and how spun up she gets the kids during the very short visits. I know nothing else. Will they be here for the summer? Will they start school here? Will I be celebrating all of their birthdays here? UGH!
OK I am off to sleep

braved it...

I packed a picnic basket wth a dinner (sandwiches etc) As soon as all of the boys came home from school We got in the car and left to the beach. We had a dinner picnic down on the beach and the boys played threw rocks in the water ( A favorite of theirs). I figure dh is gone and has duty. What a better excuse to serve bologna sanwiches and juice for dinner ;)
I got my Disney store order today! Lots of PJ's in the washer :) The boys are all excited.

MySpace

For you foster or adoptive parents have you ever looked up bioparents up?
Not that I found anything really incriminating or anything but I guess I wanted to know more about where these boys were from. With all of the inconsitacies in their history or rather lack of the parents givng any well their pages didn't clear things up any either lol

Frankie :)

The boys has his moments. Having a child who has been that age with "issues" I see a lot of possible issues in him as well...ADHD, ODD mabe a touch of OCD. Things for him do not come easy and it appears that he was allowed to just 'not try'. Made it very easy for him to slip through the cracks.
I have been doing all I can here to teach him how to read and working on hs speech difficulties. My proud Mama huge gem of the day..... The second week he was here he could barely read the very first kindergarten reader. Tonight he read me 3 pages from the #14 reader! He did not give up or whine or any of that he tried and did amazing!
I told him I was so proud of him...gave him a high five and a hug and told him he was a smart cookie. He turned to me and said "I am a smart cookie! My other Mom never said that. She never made me read to her. We didn't do reading time. I am doing good!"
I tell you tmes like that melt your heart and makes all the uncertain times and times you feel you are being jerked around fade away.
OK now to tuck in the brood and make them all burritos (tuckng them in really tight ;) )

Costco and turtles

I know you can buy almost anything at Costco but a turtle is not one of them. But I will get to the turtle part later.
I went to Costco today. I swear I should own stock in Costco, but I digress. I had to pick up some dog food and all. The lady behind me in line made a comment about how well behaved my three boys were and asked are they your only children? When I said no she laughed and said "all boys?" I said yes.... she then said "I thought I kept Costco in business with my three boys. You are probably here more than I am". I laughed because I always joke about how I keep Costco in business and how they cheer when they see us coming :)
Now onto the turltes.... my youngest loves Lance the Turtle (from Veggie Tales) Hmmm maybe loves is a bit of an understatement.... he is obsesed with him. He has this one shirt with a cartoonish turtle that is similar to Lance the Turtle. He loves to wear that shirt in the 2 year old I demand to wear this shirt every day type of way. Well the dang shirt is falling apart and I cannot find one similar. It looks like this shirt will have to fall into the laundry abyss and never return. It will be a rough few days...

no records no dentist

BioMom....well she has her issues, obviously or her kds wouldn't be in care, but she has been less than forthcoming with the workers. She has turned over little to NONE of the information requested.
I go to take the boys to the dentist as they needed for their CHET evaluation. One problem I know next to nothing about their health history. Something that has not been provided as requested. So I could not fill out their health histories and with this dentist (one of the very few that take the state insurance) since I couldn't fill out their histories the dentist would not see them. How frustrating is that?
oh and Yes I am writing down and submitting the milage for the wasted trip to the dentist.
On another note the biomom loved her "Mother's" Day present. Maybe that can be the swift kick/incentive she needs to get her ducks in a row you know?

Funny

My little man caught sight of my book The Five Love Languages. He looked at me and said "ummm Mom I thought there was only one love language. French"

IEP

Well Pierce is ofcially enrolled in an IEP. The write up was wondefully done. I am mang a copy to give to the case worker and the CHET evaluator. CHET is child health and education tracking. Basically to asses where the kids are and what their special needs may be. With the IEP he is now enrolled with the school district. So he is set for kindergarten next year.
We also went down to the beach and the two youngest spent their time trowing rocks into the water. Pierce and I searched for baby crabs under rocks and tried to find the bad eagles. We found baaby crabs and he was so excited. He thought they were cool and he had a blast.
I want to get Lance into preschool too but the classes start in Sept. The registration requires a $50 NON-refundable depost. $50 is not a fortune but it can be a hit to the pocket book should the boys not be here. I hate the not knowing if you cannot tell from the tone of my recent posts ;)
Maybe I will "ask" in a round about way if I should plan on them being here this fall.

random thoughts

Well tomorrow is Pierce's IEP evaluation. This should be "fun" haha. Actually this school os really good so I have little to worry about. I guess I am nervous for him?
On another note....keep in mind honestly I am doing my best to be supportive to bioparents... All of their belongings reek of igarette smoke. Now I swear it is all in my house. And who in their right mind (I may have typed the key there....) writes "Pimp daddy loves you" on the back of a picture to their kids? Maybe I have officially hit that milestone of I am old but pimp daddy???
my dh has almost completed our storage shed. You know I think he started it to escape a house with six boys.... but you know what? If that is all it takes to get projects done..hahaha

What

so what am I entitled to know about these boys and their case?
Like court dates? Case plans? Maybe I just want the gossip of the case? who knows lol
But I know nothing.
I feel so darn apprehensive even letting Frankie hand out his birthday invites! Not knowing how long they will be here

argh

no I am not celebrating talk like a pirate day early or anything. It has been a long frustrating and trying day. Two of the kids were fighting at all times. My two year old bit the other two year old and I had to call the SW because it left a mark on FS#3. I felt like tar, I still do. I am just up to the brim with stress. I a seriously calling it a night. The dishes will wait. The laundry can wait I am done.
The good news is the the FS's did NOT fight one bit durig the visit!! They got spun up and loud but no hitting! I had a talk with them right before they went in for visitation and talked with the SW and told her what I had said.

one more thing

I want to say how amazing our biosons are being. They love being big brothers and they ar e so loving. I was unsure how they would treat the foster kids and react to them. the worst I am getting is the whole not enough elbow room at the table thing haha but that is it.

Huge Gem

Frankie came up to me a few times today and threw his arms around me and gave me hugs :) He has been warming up more and more and getting used to not having to be in charge of everybody. I am very proud of him (and all my boys ;) )

Vent...

I was told last visit that DSHS would be arranging a transportation service for the kids. They are paying me per mile as it is so what is the difference. So I went the week waiting on the phone call about visitation. I talked to the SW a few times no mention of the visit. OK Mom amd Dad have been flaky.... I assumed that hey no visitation this week. So today I go to take my laptop in for repair. The shop they have doing the warranty service is about 70 miles away. So this morning I pack up the three non school aged kids and we hit the road. I am driving through Seattle and the worker calls saying "are you bringing them to visitation today?" "UMM no I heard nothing, I assumed there was no visitation So I am running my errands I have to today". End of story right? Yup she said so too. Tomorrow I will bring them in for a visit.
But I swear they need to reschedule visits because of the oldests preformance and how far he is behind in school.
OK Vent off

small step?

or maybe a huge leap?
Frankie came to offer me a hug I did NOT have to ask for one. This is the first time he has done this. The first few days I would offer he would refuse I would tuck him and and leave it at that. Today he came up to me and gave me a big hug. Ahhh good feelings.
Lance gets the giggles when DH makes him into a burrito at night (tucks him in). These giggles are so precious so contagious!! Then Pierce starts to giggle and says "Me next!!!"
It is funny they call us The Dad and The Mom. Reminds me of that ugly little dinosaur "not the momma" They ask about their other mom and dad now. Not too often but I reassure then that mom and dad do miss them and they are happy they are safe and being good (ok maybe I throw in the being good part haha)

I told

dh that I made that huge decision today. He looked at me and I could tell he knew it hurt me to say I wouldn't take the baby. But he looked me in the eyes and said "We need to keep familes together" I know he was and is on the same page as I am. Trust me it is a tough decision. But to have the option of taking the baby and having them remove a foster child or just leaving the boys together.... I will leave the boys together. Luckily dh feels the same.
Now if the social worker will call me eventually to let me know when the parental visitation will be. Maybe they will not have a visit this week?? I need to talk to the sw and get her to schedule visits around Frankies school. He is simply struggling too much to miss school. But that is another vent I suppose

Certifiable

In an effort to make things easier and keep these boys together. I TURNED DOWN placement of baby girl!
Part of me wants to cry....no sob. But no I turned down the placement to keep these siblings together. Why did I have to? No one could agree on it, it being the license exception. The placement coordinator would have fought for the exception had I wanted her to.
Part of me is OK with it all though. I really do love these boys and I think we can help them a lot.
I always said I was not up for straight fostering. That I couldn't handle it at all. I didn't WANT to have kids for the unknown amount of time. Yet here I am doing just that and passing up a newborn adoptive placement??? What is wrong with me?!?!?

having six children

justifies making a whole turkey for no special occasion on a Tuesday night!! haha I even have leftovers ;) So I can spread it out to make dinner tomorrow turkey braid it is ;)

Polly

wanna cracker!!
Seems that our little Lance is quite the parrot! hahaFrom being told he had minimal verbal skill coming into care he has made a lot of progress at his other foster home

Education

I warned you I would get to this today, so here it goes.
I did not go to college. Of the many excuses...let's just say life got in the way. I stress to my children how important schooling is. THAT is their one job. Do well in school. However that means I, as a mom, have to do my part too. If it is being supportive, reminding them to do their work, setting reading time every day, going to school events, encouraging activities that they are interested in and introducing new things.
The oldest foster son is the only one in school. I got some belongings of his which included his school backpack. It was full. Full of what? Incomplete school work. Some half started some never done. FULL I am not saying a day worth of work..... weeks of work...if not months.
At school he is at the end of the first grade year. He is preforming at a beginning kindergarten level. It makes me sad it does. IF he is here the beginning of the next school year, should I ask (or can I) that he be held back a year? Well we are starting an IEP for both him and his brother so I can hope that it is enough intervention that we can help them catch up.
It frustrates AND angers me that a parent can care so little that a little kid is so far behind, not due to intellectual inability but rather lack of parental involvement

May is

Foster parent/family appreciation month so go and hug a foster parent or something haha