Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Bear's FTDM update

I have some points I would like to make in this update.
-I think it is odd that all that was discussed was what the MOTHER should be doing to get her son back. Dad lives with her and he has nothing no requirements etc discussed That strikes me as just plain odd you know?
-The parents were too 'sick' to make the meeting. So there was a telephone conference.
-I would venture a safe bet that at the very least the father was rather "impaired"
-Brought back a lot of memories of my own father and his issues and how he was, during the bad times. It left most of us at the meeting in the room, scratching our heads and wondering "what did he say/mean?!?!?!"
-Positive I have had Bear for 5 almost 6 months and his father has seen him the last two visits that weren't cancelled. When Dad is at the visits it is a positive thing for dad and Bear!
-Mom is trying and I have nothing but the highest hopes for her I really do.
-Reunification is the agenda and ultimate goal but when that will be done? no one knows and it was not discussed.

So I left the meeting NOT knowing more than I went in knowing except for feeling a bit attacked by the father over my parenting skills. HOWEVER that is completely normal. The bioparent is not raising their child and anyone else doing it is doing it wrong.

2 comments:

Angel The Alien said...

That IS strange that they aren't requiring the dad to do anything! Are the parents married? Is custody of the baby going to be going just to the mother? It would seem that they would want the dad to participate in everything, if he is going to be in Bear's life at all, because having a mother who has gained a lot of skills and done a lot of hard work, but a father who is exactly the same as before, is futile!

Gina said...

that is the thing they DO live together. They have had a very typical relationship of CPS type cases. That in itself gives me the not too warm fuzzies.
I will discuss as much as I can with the worker. I am not trying to sabotage the case or anything. I just wonder why it seems so one sided since they both live together. I hope that makes sense