Picked one

OK I picked an attorney. THe ONLY one who took the time to talk to me one on one. I let the CW know she said Good that she likes this one. So I think that is a good sign ;)


On a side not my 2y/o is standing in front of the fan with his superman shirt and cape his cape is flying in the wind he says "da da daaaaa I flying"

HAHA

Well DH called me. They are back!!! but I still cannot see him until tomorrow because he has duty or as the kids say with a giggle DOODY.
He told me he let the folks at work know we were expecting. He said he liked doing it too just for the shock value. He got two comments, "Dang. how many kids DO you have again?!?!?!" and "You do know what causes that right?"haha.
To the how many kids question he answered something to the effect of "I am not sure rigt now. 7 I think?? ". He really enjoys messing with the guys at work I swear.
I did better today. I made it through school shopping at Wal-Mart!! Lots of stuff and some extras for the kids in the classes who need it.
I even took the kids to DQ for ice cream because they were so good!
I need to take a shower and clean the house some more but eh baby steps HAHAHAHA

Another Atta boy for Liam

I don't know how I forgot to post this. Liam got a Nintendo DS from DS#2 DS#2 upgraded to aa DS Lite for his birthday so he handed his down to his brother. Liam had a gameboy but it was a gameboy SP.
Anyway he had expressed an interest in passing it on to someone without one. Another kid from 'the office" Well fast forward to his worker coming out to check on him, she mentions whe know a boy who is in the office right now who needs one. Liam runs upstairs and brings down his gameboy and charger and hands it over. My 9y/o goes upstairs and get a game for this other little bo to have too.
I am very proud that mu boys are being so selfless.
I really think the whole fostering thing has really opened our eyes and hearts to the kids in the system. I aam amazed at the impact on our children though

YIPPIE!!!

I got two garbage bags of "fluffy girl" maternity clothes FOR FREE!!! OMG! I do not think this person has ANY idea how much this helps me. I got all 10 kinds of emotional about it. then again I am here watching COPS and crying. So I am hopeless.

OOOOOOK

'splain this to me please.
I get a voucher from the state in themail today. I think GREAT a clothing voucher. Then I look at it. This is for Bear who is 5 months old.... OK almost 6 months. He got a voucher for get this..... A mini voice recorder with tapes!! WHAT??? I guess the kiddo is planning on dictating his next novel. I got no notice from the SW as to WHY I got this voucher or exactly what I am supposed to record.
Maybe they want to hear my loud obnoxious singing of Veggie Tales tunes??? hehe
Seriously maybe it is for first words? It can't be for voice record keeping beause I take the most detailed notes and turn them in weekly they could not possibly want more. Most foster parents do not even do that.
I am curious to see what it is for.
I thought maybe for birth mom to talk to her son via recordings but why wouldn't they just send it to her?

I am amazed

at (or is it with?) my children. We pick up the kids for respite. My two year old says "Hi guys! Watch DVD?" He of course then proceeds to tell me I need to put on a DVD lol

Liam comes to me yesterday and asks, "what is our sisters name again?"

They are just so accepting of other kids and welcome them into our home.

I am....

SO tired!!
I will tell you two extra little ones make it so much harder. I am at the end of my energy level. I have a hard time walking through the entire grocery store without having to sit down to keep from passing out. 6 kids??? Well I would rather have the grocery store lol

It is that darn anemia that is getting me. Well that and prenancy. LOL but heck combine them and dang what a challenge.

As bad as it sounds I am counting the days until we are down two. I need the rest. Then school starts soon and I can get a little bit of rest and if I am lucky I can catch up on housework....maybe

one of my guilty pleasures

Whew

OK Bear as enough clothes for now. I got.... 42 shirts (a few sweaters long sleeves and short sleeves), 17 jeans/sweats, about 5 shorts,a few pairs of PJ's 3 jackets and 2 sweat jackets for $50! Not too bad. Considering he came with the clothes on his back one outfit that was too small and his older sister PJ's I think he is off to a really good start. That doesn't count what I bought him before this lol He is set through winter.
I love good deals and garage sales :p

One last thing for tonight

You know before doing this foster care schtick I never looked at a child and thought anything other than "oh what a cute kid" Now I look at kids and think "oh what a cute kid" THEN I look at/for FAS features.
Not that I judge the kids on these things. It is just such a huge part of our day to day that I seem to LOOK for it

don't hate me....

But I got more than half of my Christmas shopping DONE! can you believe it?? I am stuck as to what to get my 9 year old and my 12 y/o well his is expensive so we wait ;)
The only bad thing is if Bear goes home earlier than Christmas then well I won't get to see him open his toys.

Baby guesses take 2

Baby stat guesses

They are simply

ADORABLE!
My two respites are here. I think it makes it harder because I know they are free for adoption. I want to say they can stay forever! But no, they are here for 6 days and that is it.
I have a girl in the house. OMG that is new! I loved brushing her hair after her bath tonight. How silly is that? I really do think this house needs a shot of estrogen.

Baby related poll

Guess Baby G's stats

Todays adventure

I get to the OB. I get taken back to my regular OB's partners office for the exam. OK no problem she fills in for him should he be gone or whatever.... I will say however this Dr has the bedside manner of a troll. I will now call her Dr. Troll. She did my pap and pinched me! after I warned her and dang near gave her written instructions on how to do it without pinching me. Of course though I am just a patient and know nothing about my body. Let me rewind here a bit. She comes into the office originally and says "So why are you here? You were just here."
She looks at Bear and mentions "My God he has a huge head" WTF?!?!?!?! How rude of her.
So hormones and all. Dr Troll can kiss my arse!! I hope to NEVER ever see her again.

Get Mom a phillips Screwdriver....

is responded to with "Hey Mom I found my glasses in the garage on the fooseball table" Me: "son how'd they get there?" Him: "I have no idea" Me: " so where is that screwdriver?" Him: "Dang I knew I forgot something!!" He goes down stairs and then comes back up without the screwdriver AND without the other pair of glasses! Me: "Son WHERE are your glasses" Him: "Oh man!! ummmm I don't know"
I love him I truly do! However if anyone fits the title of absent minded professor it is him!! He has a brilliant mind just NO common sense and flighty as can be.
JUST now he comes upstairs afte being told to put his glasses in their cases so he doesn't lose them again. We put them in the case, he walks out of theroom and he comes back and says "Do you have my glasses?" OMG! He lost both pairs in their cases!!! I give up LOL

Th news my readers should have been told.

not like it is earth shattering or acualy news worthy... but here it is.
I am pregnant again. Teach me to laugh a little at the old wive's tale that once you adopt you become pregnant. I will be completely honest here and say this new turn in events totally took DH and I by surprise. DH is of course not home. He left before I found out!! I emailed him a picture of the digital test that said 'pregnant'. He honestly thought I was joking! haha We were told that without medical intervention a pregnancy would not happen.
I have had my first ultrasound and we saw a beautiful little baby bean with a wonderful fluttering heartbeat!
Tests revealed I am severely anemic. And the doctors are also testing my kidney function too. Yeah it appears I am falling apart or something haha. Seriously though I am glad the doctors are doing EVERYTHING they should be. I have to see a preinatologist as well. I am high risk and it seems that with each passing test something new is popping up that fits into that high risk category.
I am FAR FAR from out of the woods with this pregnancy. But we will see how things go. We are still going to adopt Liam. We are still inquiring about northwest boy for adoption too! Unlike the first thing out of my mother's mouth "Are you going to give back those 'other kids' " Yeah made me 10 kinds of angry!
We have just truly been blessed yet again.

GRRRRRRRRRRRRR

Yeah that is how I feel today.
I took Bear in for his visit. Mom didn't show up. She called the SW and told her but I had already left (I had to go have bloodwork @ the Dr. done) So I SIT in the office for 40 minutes no mom so I am ticked. I had no idea that mom was going to be a no show. But yet I was left to sit in the office with FOUR kids. So I say hey i am tired of waiting and LEAVE!
I head up north to my doctor appointment I had this afternoon. I was a bit early so we hung out in the van talking for a bit. Turned into bickering with the older boys Grrr.
So I say OK change of scenery let's go into the Dr's office! I get in to check in only to find out my appointment was cancelled!! OK not the dr's fault there was an emergency. But did anyone call me?? NOPE !!!
So I drove about 100 miles today FOR NOTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My fuse is short my temper is quick and I feel guilty for being so pissy with the kids.
I want to just go to sleep. But the kids are still up. Calgon.... take me awayyyyyyyyyyyyyy

You see that??

There on the horizon. Squint and you can juuuust make it out. See that?? It is our foster care payments!!! I got the invoice on Saturday and called it in. So next week we should get out deposit!! Holy moly... only two and a half months and we are getting the $.


On other news. Tomorrow I have to supervise another visit and I feel TERRIBLE why? well because I have a dr appointment tomorrow. One of those really hard to get appointments and I HAD to take it. So I have to cut our visit short. SIGH
I did get a BUNCH of clothes for Bear. Enough that he will be growing into them for the next several months. If he goes back to Mom in that time she will have enough to where she won't have to worry about buying clothes right off the bat. I know things are super tight for her. I am trying to get a store of toys together for him too. I have been supplementing most of his toys with all of the kids toys we have here. I am trying to budget more for Bear so he will have plenty to take with him for his moms. Court is later this month and we will have a plan and maybe a timeframe. I cannot make it because I will have the two respite kiddos.

I have asked

My adoption worker to submit our homestudy for a 15 year old boy who sounds PERFECT for our family. Not without his faults but heck who isn't. Plus he comes with a dog LOL That would be interesting.
Dh even said he would be a great addition to our family. This coming from a man who at the begining of this process was set against any child over 3. We have instead opened ourselves to considering a whole different age level. That Level is "umm under 18??" LOL

Love it!

I am watching one of my favorite movies, Whale Rider I bawl like a baby everytime. But I love the message of the movie. It is awesome .... check it out if you haven't.

Tomorrow I am headed to a powwow. I am meeting Bears birth mom there to make up for her missed visit. I am aparently one of the "nicest foster moms". OK If she says so. Now if they would pay me! lol I am nice but quickly becoming bitter lol. The SW was AMAZED we still haven't seen payment. Yeah well me too lol

Next week

I am taking on TWO more children believe it or not ONE is a GIRL!!! hahaha it is only a week though. I am providing respite for another foster parent. She could find NO respite providers at all in the area. Though these two are up for adoption too. I better not fall in love with them!!!

Whew that will be quite interesting!!
Me and 6 kids for the week. Ummm yeah fun abounds hahaha

GRRR & people amaze me (funny)

Well DH did not pick up his promotion. One of my capital A stressors this week Now that I know the results I am past anxiety and onto upset. DH is hurt. He is quite discontented and feeling unappreciated in his carer. if he weren't 2 years to military retirement he would have not reenlisted last year. I want to make him feel better but of course I won't even see him again for weeks so heck I cannot even give him a hug to console him.

Now for my people are idiots moment.
Idiot : "so where do you live"
Me: "_____ Island"
Isiot "oh, is that close to the water?"

Considering

You know if things with Bear work to where he goes home to family.... I have been entertaining the idea of adopting a teen. Not for any other reason than the NEED for these kids to have some sort of stable home. Someone to help them when they get older and how to be productive adults. The sheer amount of older children in our area alone who need placements is astonishing
Am I crazy?

Anxiety = stress issues

The past couple of weeks My body has decided that falling asleep befor 3am is unnecesary even WITH Ambien. I then sleep in until 9 am. THANK GOD that our babies are going through growth spurts and are sleeping a lot at night now. Through til they wake me up at 9am lol
I did look up places to stay in CO when we go there next year. I may actually get a place near where DH Grew up. This time we will have to take a day and 'play' in Denver as well. Of course family and friends darn well better want to see us ;)
I will try looking into a vacation rental too. That may be nicer with a larger family... though I would miss maid service;)

update on payment

Well tomorrow will be "two weeks for your payment" Yeah I have not seen the invoice which I have to fill out to be paid! After I complete the invoice it takes about a week. So ummmmm 2 weeks my arse

So who do I flick in the forehead?

Today the transporter was SUPPOSED to pick up Bear and take him to visitation. A few things happened all at once you should know.
1. Bears worker will be moving to another office as of next week
2. Bears worker is on vacation, until net week
3. Bears workers supervisor is ALSO on vacation
4. Mom has no phone now apparently

The trasporter called and I was initially NOT impressed with her professionalism on the phone.
So last night she calls saying well I don't think the visit will happen I cannot call mom and no one reserved a room for the visit etc etc.
But she would call this am to let me know what she found out.
Long frustrating story short. She could not get ahold of bio mom and no one in the office has talked to her so there was to be no visit.
I could not just go to the office (which is a 30 minute drive) because Liam had a therapy appointment in home today.
I am having one of two visions in my head. Each makes me angry. One mom took the bus hours to see Bear and was left in the waiting room with NO VISIT. Or two she relapsed and she 'forgot' and never showed.
So now there is no visit and no visit next week either because NO ONE has called me. I have to transport and supervise every other week (insert frustration here).

It figures

I got good news today, that is not the issue. But I am HOT I am cranky and I am tired. A lethal combination. Of course this is the night my 9 y/o loses his brand new transistions eyeglasses! The catcher. he put them where he wouldn't lose them. Well buddy ya get a big o' F on that don't ya?
The baby is cranky and wants held ALL the time, the 2y/o is fighting going to sleep... he actually called me a bad boy! for putting him to bed. And my husband. I love that man Lord knows I do. But whenever I have nights like this he calls all the time with silly things. One of those things I want to yell "Just make a decision and go with it I do not care" Of course that is mostly hormones talking. but you get the point.
Ahhh it is ok though I did have a nice conversation with my mother in law this afternoon. That is always a plus. I love that woman she is a great person.

Now I have less than a week to find out about one of my capital A stressors and about a week for the other. So bring it on! Let's get this week flying by!

How does nov 17th look for you ?

Yeah it looks good for us. Why? well it will probably the date that Liam's adoption will be finalized?!?!??!?!?!
Where do you set up registries for attorney fees?? hahahaha

I dislike the fact

that I am a worry wort. I dislike sitting here worrying about things that I either have no control over or I am not even sure will BE happening. UGH!
I should wear a scarlett A for ANXIETY lol

Gasp

After complaing about money I am going to ohhh and ahh over my recent purchase. I got a mink stripe body pillow at Costco. I went in for dog food and veggies, came out with a pillow too haha OMG!!!!!!!!! This thing is so comfortable. My old pillow is about 4-5 years old so it was time for a replacement. So I dusted off the wallet and spent a whopping $14 on my new pillow :p
It is so soft you just want to cuddle up with it all day long :)

THANK YOU!!

I had to go to doctor appointment today. That was OK not a huge deal. As I come in with three of my kids the nurse asks my age. When I say "32" she looks at me and says "You look much younger than that" Oh for me feeling so haggard lately and feeling old that comment made my day. I could have kissed her! Then again had I done that I am not sure they would want me back in that dr's office EVER again haha

Well I got a response

I am DIRECTLY quoting the first word "D'oh!"
I will be getting paid. I am not kidding when I say they are A LOT behind. But the kicker? It will still be about 2 weeks

She MAY be doing it

Mom has given CLEAN UA's and has a doctors note for missing all of the ones she did!! Next week she gets to visit with Bear! Holy Moly! She is on the right track. Cross your fingers she does it this time. I would be really proud of her if she did.

Sounding like a hypocryte

I do not foster for the money. I REALLY don't. If I wanted to be a paid babysitter I would make MUCH more owning my own in home daycare again.
That being said. I have not seen a cent for Bear. If it weren't for WIC paying for the bulk of his formula we would be in BIG trouble. He came with NOTHING, so we have had to get everything. I got my invoice for this month. My other son is on it but Bear isn't. So I finally called the worker and said hey...yeah I have no money for Bear could you look into this?
So let's see how long this takes to get solved. So I can say after dealing with 2 different offices. One works hard to make sure foster parents get any and all money they are due, this other one appears to take their time. The other office I got paid EOM when the kids were only here 2 weeks. Bear has been here umm 5 weeks? Almost 6 and I have not even seen proof of what we will be paid.

Last

Well ...... yawn...... we were the last case in the morning, So I was sitting in rock hard seats from 8-1230. The time for Bears case came along. It lasted 2 minutes. NO I am not kidding 2 WHOLE minutes. No neither of his bio parents made it to court. I was able to get child care for FOUR children and drag my butt into court bright and early but THEY couldn't make it. It is hard for me. I want to be so angry at these "parents". I want to find them and yell at them or flick them in the forehead or something. Bio mom did manage to contact her atty. So that is on the record she made that attempt. But do you know how many cases I sat through. Would you like to know the aveage of parents who DID show? 1 in 5. In gerneral I was angry today. I cannot understand people and their attitudes toward their children.
I did not get to speak today. I was not asked for any input. BUT my written statement was entered into the record. I am glad I wrote a statement otherwise I would have been voiceless. As would Bear......
Next month I have to go bac. SAME hearing over again but since biomom made the call we go through it again.
Possibly another Case in Oct if they want a fact finding case. But let's put it the way the wokrer did. If there is ANY chance that the fact finding mission will yield ANY truth to the charges chances are the bio parents will not want to pursue that trial. The fact is the evidence against the bios is so strong they will NOT want that on the record. So they will agree to the dependency hearing and "work their case plan". I however, the ONLY advocate in the begining, I doubt they will. They have made NO effort thus far why think they will do anything they are supposed to? But I encourge them to prove me wrong

Court tomorrow

Well I have to go to court in the morning for Bear. I am nervous. I am also wondering a few things. First, how long will I have to sit around the court room? I really hope we are first on the docket. Second, Since 'Mom' and 'Dad' have shown no interest in seeing him will they even show up to court? Third I hope my written statement goes over well. I technically do not have to show up at all since I submted my offical wrtten statement (and my log notes and a couple pages of pictures) to the court. But as Baggage mentioned even though do not have to be there showing up and having it in the records I appeared will look favorably on my side of the table, especially if we go to adoption. So I put on a skirt (EWWWWW) and sit my arse in the courtroom.

My little Liam has been a trying handful lately. I am just a bundle of nerves. So his grandpa saying he got the time off and would like to take him on that fishing trip could not have come at a better time!How terrible is that of a Mom to say?!?!?!
It is just HARD to parent spirited children or children with more issues than the average child. I hope this time out camping with Grandpa will be a stress reliever for us all.

I may be reinacting

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Well at least a scene. I went to our local fruit stand and bought a flat of blueberries and a flat of raspberries. That is almost all that I have eaten today. I may turn into a blueberry yet!

Bear

decided 2:30am would be a great time to complain and all about how small his co-sleeper is. Flailing around and hitting the sides. Sort of to say "Hey Mom?? Yeah I got HUGE!!" So I finally placed him in the crib about 30 minutes ago. So far not a peep. Yeah knock on wood.
But am I sleeping? Nope I am sitting here worried about him... he is in the next room!!! I need some serious help or something haha

I said no

We have unofficially 'closed our doors' to new placements. Not because we don't WANT more children but because we are one short of capacity now and we are not sure where things are going with Baby and all. On a side note Baby needs a nickname. We call him bear so I will call him Bear here as well :) There is another factor as well. Not to mention dh is out for awhile and well I don't want to take on too much. BUT all of that being said I FEEL GUILTY. I said no to our placement coordinator today. No to a little 4 year old, little boy of course.
Now the darn guilt is eating at me. I logically know we are not the ONLY foster home in the county but I still feel the need to take in all I can and help all I can. Le Sigh

Why is it

When you need to talk to someone close to you they aren't available? My husband is on the big grey beast somewhere on the water. My mom would be NO help. My MIL was asleep HOURS ago and if I call this late it better be life or death (which this isn't).
And darn Baggage must be sleeping too. Le Sigh.
So I have an email to DH and one to Baggage any money bets on who replys first??
OK I am going to try to go to sleep.

I have realized I am crazy

And maybe a bit...comfortably numb lol. Not only do I welcome a housefull of children and ALL of their laundry but I have TWO babies (well one baby one toddler)in cloth diapers. You know I have lost track of how much laundry I do. Or maybe I have blocked it out for sanity's sake?? haha

On another note. I put together the crib in the EMPTY bedroom, well full of dressers beds and now a crib but you get my point haha. Yes empty! And still empty. It is amazing. I will be putting him into the crib at nap times and maybe slowly transitioning him into the crib at night time???? Well within a couple of months at least.

snore....

So baby is asleep Miniman is sleeping after his crash from a sugar high (brothers birthday cake). DH stod the midnight to 8 am watch and slept only a couple of hours yesterday then came hme to the Grandpa meeting and dinner and cake. He is out cold too. The other two boys are downstairs on a videogame marathon ;) Wow... Maybe I should sleep too or something?/

I forgot today I lost a dang crown!! Same one that had come off several times befor. This time the post BROKE so yeah the crown is NOT going back on. I am at the verge of having the dentist pull the post :( It HURTS and it is now beyond repair and to be honest I cannot afford an implant or another bridge.

Whew

The meeting with Grandpa went REALLY well. We talked for hours. Did some typical visit get to know each other stuff. He told us he thinks we are "real people" and that Liam is a great fit here. He wanted to know when we will be adopting him and is completely supportive of us changin his name. He said he couldn't understand why in the world his biomom named him what she did. Baggage can attest to how flippin off the wall his birth name is.
Grandpa says he is happy and Will continue visitationin anyway WE feel is OK. LOAD off our mind trust me.
We learned Mom is on the other side of the country. She is currently clean but there is a reason, she is pregnant again. Yeah Grandpa says that it will end the same way. She ONLY got clean because she got pregnantand is leading the SAME life as before. Another child.... well I cannot tell you how upset that makes me. But this is another rant all together. Had she been in the area though I would have offered to take the baby too if needed. But being accross the country that won't happen I am sure....
So all is done with that first meeting WHEW

Maybe it feels just too right.

So I am sitting here tonight. My oldest son is in CA visiting his biodad for the summer. DH took our 8 y/o (who will be 9 Sunday!!!) and our 5 y/o to see the new Harry Potter movie. There was no way I could have went with the two year old and infant! So DH is out doing the daddy thing with the boys. They even ate junk food for dinner :) So here I sit in my huge room I have a two year old who likes to sleep lengthwise accross the bed, Nothing like knees in the kidneys. Baby is in his co-sleeper all swaddled and contently sleeping. My three dogs are in their respectiv posts. My dog is at my bedside. The one German Shepherd is guarding the door and stairs. No one will get past him. The other shepherd? Well he is playing the roll of electric blanket on our 5 y/o bed ;)
It gives me time to reflect how darn RIGHT things feel right now. Liam is testing boundaries. I honestly think he is waiting on me to say I am tired of him and send him packing. Nope we love the little guy and his phase he is going through right now.
Baby well he lights up your world :) A smile that just warms your heart.
It all feels right. Our family seems almost dare I say, perfect! Baby is into a routine. The two year old has mellowed a bit on his terrible pass me a valium twos. The 5 and 8 y/o play A LOT together and get along really well.
Ahhhh summertime bliss.

Chippendales in his future

My two year old is a little nudist. He likes to streak... let the 'boys' hang in the breeze etc.. You get the point. NORMALLY this display of his stripping skills is kept at home. Until today that is. We were in the Store. He was in the cart part of the cart... not the seat (rare occurance really) He stands up and starts singing...his OTHER favorite pasttime. The song? "We are the champions" by Queen (he sings it pretty well for two years old). anyway imagine this little boy singing we are the champions and starting to take off his diaper and shorts. Oh man! This little one keeps me on my toes!

More firsts & stuff

Well today Baby rolled over!! It was one of those "Wait a minute did he just do that?" things. Put him back on his tummy and sure enough he rolled again :)
First his first tooth now rolling over. He will be crawling next I swear.

Kudos
A two thumbs up to our doctor. I found out she neglected to note Baby's Mongolian spots. I do NOT want to be falsely accused of bruising the baby I made a point to ask the doctor to note them. Because they do resemble bruises (on Baby they are dark brown spots). Anyway I found out during a meeting about the state of Baby's case that it was not included in the well child check. I called immediately after and left a message for the doctor. that was yesterday. By this morning the CHET screener had a new copy of the well child waiting for her on her fax machine ;) She said it was the fastest she had seen haha

I got my new cell phone today! I know "so what??" but mine was so outdated I might as well have been carrying one of those HUGE phones from the late 80's haha

I got a voucher to get Baby some clothes since he came with nothing. $100. But I stretched that $100 until it screamed.

Higher standard

OK let me start by saying we really love all kinds of different cultures. We explore different cultures every opportunity we get I love testing out new foods (shhhhh hehe). That being said there is nothing like being told you have to do things for a child culturally when you KNOW their own bio parents don't do anything to enhance/nuture their culture. If I had this child on my own with a person of a different ethnicity/culture not one person require I expose this child to his or her culture from the fathers side. Like I said I do not mind doing it I am actually looking forward to it. It's not just a job it's an adventure hehehe It is just the inequality of requirements that makes me scratch my head.

OW!!!

Well Guess what? Baby who is a whopping 4 months old cut his first tooth!!
We have court later this month too about him so wish us luck :)

WOW

OK I went and picked up HALF Of Liams belongings. there were six med/lg boxes and a bag! That is on top of the clothes he came with. He is in seventh heaven to have all of his things again.
He keeps asking which of the kids are adopted? Is Baby adopted? Do you want to adopt him? Is my other little brother (our 2y/o) are my big brothers?
He has had a hard time grasping that I am birth mom to 3 of them. He has a hard time understanding NOT all parents loose their kids. He thought all Moms and Dads "gave" their kids to "the office". I explained only some Moms and dad's need time to get things safe in their lives. He then said he birth mom and dad would soon have a safe place. Have you ever tried to explain to a 5 y/o that "hey sorry kid, your birth parents screwed the pooch and are never getting you back and lost their parental rights"? Finding the right words is HARD. I explained the best I could and then stated two positives. One he has a really cool grandpa he can talk to whenever he wants and two when he turns 18 he can find his birth mom and dad and ask them anything he wants. That seemed to make him feel much better.
I think I need to be looking into books to explain adoption to kids too!

Oddities when it comes to dates......

When I met DH I thought it was funny that he has the same birthday as my brother. It was funnier when I found out I shared a birthday with his Mom and Aunt. Then outrageous when we learned our exes also shared a birthday. Hillarious when the dog I got DH also has my birthday.....Total accident honest!
Now I have had the feeling that Liam's birthday seemed very familiar. Well I figured it out. He was born on the exact due date of the baby I lost when I was 13 weeks pregnant. And Baby? Well he was born on the due date of my youngest though a different year of course ;)
Odd no?

Well I made the first step

I looked up Babys tribe online and placed a call. I am not sure how far it will get though. The CW said I was welcome to contact the tribe. I almost feel like it is a test. On of those "Let's see if she makes an effort" things. I emailed the CW Sat (I know she won't get it until Monday) to ask if there was a POC for the tribe I should have. The CW liked the notes I kept on Baby. She said she rarely gets things like that and she was impressed. All it is is notes about things that happen, I observe and any milestones that are reached.
Now I am sad for Baby too. I know he is in a home where TRUST me he is loved and well taken care of. But when parents do not even ask about their child or request the visits they are entitled to in 3 weeks...... Well that would break anyones heart. makes me angry too.
the question of the hour.... Will we be the adoptive placement for Baby? The CW made a comment she is glad we have an approved home study and that she hopes this is all wrapped up before it expires. What does that imply to you? Yeah me too.
So I will do my best to comply with everything and still keep notes and make court dates. Also I am doing my best to meet Babys cultural needs. Maybe the tribe will also look favorably on that?? Who knows. I have been reading up on ICWA and I am not any more clear than when I began.

OKie Dokie WTheck is going to happen?

I have Baby who is now 4 months old. Trying not to divulge any personal info. this is not his bioparents first dealing with not having kids with them. One child was to be adopted by a family member. That child was taken by the tribe to another family in another state. That case was in that other state while the family member (who WAS going to adopt)lives just around the corner from me. Baby's case is being handled by the state we are in..... confused yet? The SW called today and said "so you are his foster-adopt placement right?" Ummmmmmm I replied "oh we would LOVE to adopt him he is a wonderful baby, but last we were told the goal was RU". I got the impression from the answer that it does not look like it will go that way??

So at this point I guess we are identified as his possible adoptive placement?? But if the tribe gets involved and wants to take it over we could lose him.
Ugh major suckage. I know that he has the entire family wrapped around his chubby little finger. My DH and boys would JUMP at the chance to welcome him as a permanant part of our lives. I go in tomorrow to DCFS to meet with his social worker and have some screenings done.Maybe I will have more answers then? wish us luck.


Liams grandpa will be here next weekend! He is coming for our little mans birthday dinner. It will be nice to meet him. He did say that if we were uneasy with his communication with Liam to assure Liam did not get bounced around any more he would step out of the picture if that is what we wanted. I assured him we were happy he was there for Liam and we welcome him into our family. He did also state that his daughter (Liams bio mom) asks about Liam but he hasn't told her anything other than he is fine and will not say any more unless we want him to. So now we are at a point where we have to talk about that too. UGH. I am all for open adoptions honest. Having some sort of contact with her and us NOT with Liam would help all involved. But she is NOT someone I want in his life. When he is 18 that is up to Liam But at 5 he does not heed that inconsistancy and the drama some lifestyles bring.
Grandpa loves the pitures I send too. So my photography bug does not intimidate him haha

But Mom I want to!!

Liam: "it is not fair that I can't do the fireworks"
Me: "But Liam you are not old enough to use a lighter. But isn't it fun to watch them?"
Liam "then why even have a 4th of July?"
Me: "Because we are celebrating our independence as a country"
Liam: "what is independence?"
Me: "That is doing things on your own"
Liam: "oh you mean like LIGHTING FIREWORKS?!?!?!?!" as he stomps off

Yes the typical 5 year old wanting to be a big boy and do things that big boys do. My 12 y/o is not allowed to light fireworks. But of course in Liam's mind we are just being mean to him.

Tomorrow My husband has to go to DCFS and pick up 6 boxes of Liams belongings. Holy Moly! I have him doing it because to be honest not sure everything will fit in my van and heck the office is about 3 miles from his work and on his way home. Win win.
Liams counselor comes tomorrow as well.

Legally Free

In terms of adpotion I thought that that term would give me piece of mind. we took Liam in knowing he was legally free for adption. Parental rights had been termnated etc. First the mystery family member came forward then they stepped back. Then biodad comes forward!!! \his rights have been terminated. So you think that too bad so sad right? Well he has threatened to appeal. Not that he has a legal nor clean and sober leg to stand on. But you have got to be kidding me?!?!?!?!?! Now the fact that he MAY have some Native American in him has popped back up. So again they have to do that geneological search into tribal records. Once the paperwork is submitted by his case worker we have 60 days to sit and worry while the tribe has the opportunity to respond. Chances are they will not take an interest in his case should he even be found to have a tribal affiliaton. But the chance is there.
UGH UGH and triple UGH

My Little Liam

We have been discussing adoption and all....a lot. He HATES his birth name. If you knew it you would not blame the poor kid trust me. When I have to spell out his name to a dr or school or whatever, He says "My name is Liam". So we discussed changing his name when he is adopted. He was VERY excited. We talked about names and all of our names and how they all meant something or we were named after someone. We talked about changing his middle name and actually giving him two middle names (a sort of tradition we have). We think we know exactly what the name will be! He said he loves it. He has been practicing it all night and also is very proud his name will be after someone. He said he likes our last name too that it is easy but "I have to get used to being that name".

I forgot to update about his counselor. She came she did ask what we wanted out of conseling. My main goal is to make sure he deals with any grief and loss and that the adjustment goes well. She said she will do all she can with him but she is not used to a child being so well adjusted! HAHA can you belive that. She said she is usually tasked children with a lot more issues. This coming week Liam will be doing some art therapy ans opefully be able to get some of his feelings to the surface. Good news is I am not footing the bill huh? No seriously he had an OK time talking to her and he said next week should be "fun".

I am terrible

After gettingg everyone ready and sternly saying if you all do not have everything they wanted to take with them..... too bad. Once I locked the door that was it we were not going back for anything. Well Make it down the road 15 minutes and I realize I forgot my camera!!! Of corse my husband forgot the baby's formula too. While I could justify stopping to buy a can of formula I couldn't justify a new camera ;p
We made it down to the aquarium and come to find out though Liam has lived his whole life in this area he has never been to downtown Seattle and never been to the aquarium. First let me say that I am VERY happy that we bought the year passes to the zoo and aquarium with our group of seven today the aquarium pass has paid for iself already :)
We had a blast. Our two year old though was done with the touch pool after touching the first squishy underwater creature haha. The baby loved all of the lights and moving fish. He was comfy and content being carried in the sling for the most of the time.
We also went to Pike Place Market. I LOVE that place. I love the artsy feel of the downtown area all of the sights and the smells,, everything from the fresh cut flowers to the fresh baked goods. We OF COURSE stopped by my favorite Greek place and stood in line to even get to the window to order. Liam whined "I don't know why we are waiting so long for Greek foods" then after his first bite "oooooh this is goooood" I made a stop at Piroshky Piroshky Flaky buttery heaven I tell you!!
NowI am home and working on cleaning my room (I cannot be a hypocrite you know) and doin laundry. So much for a life of a tourist. Back to the grind.

Doughnuts!

Liam loves doughnuts. When he first got here I told him I would make whatever he wanted for dinner. When his answer was "doughnuts" I needed to go into the explination of what appropriate DINNER food was. But when asked what he wants to eat for each and every meal the answer was doughnuts. Today We took him out for a doughnut at Krispy Kreme! He was the happoest kid on the planet! Meanwhile my two year old was running around singing "No Nuts. Yummy No Nuts" After school girl tyoe laughter I corrected his pronunciation hehehe.
He however after two bites of Nonuts said that he was done and wanted his berries. He picked up a small basket of raspberries at the farmers market while we were there. He LOVES berries of all types but like Mommy he likes raspberries the best ;)
tomorrow we are heading to Seattle. We are hitting the aquarium and some downtown touristy stuff.
I almost ended up with two more boys this weekend. A placement was needed for a 3 y/o and 1.5 y/o boy. I would have said yes. But DH suggested we take a break a bit since Baby is just settling into a schedule and we are still recovering from having eight boys here. So I said no. It broke my heart and I still want to know how they are and if they have a home. I hae caring so much sometimes. I do not know how, but I care so much for these kids I never met :(

Oh yeah

Baby is on WIC now. The birth-Mom had used the checks though so I have to wait until next month.
BUT That will help out a TON

six shots later

Well I took Baby and Liam to the doctor today. The doctor came into the room and said "you I remember these kids are new though." She asked about the last sibling group I had here. I told her about the progress they made nd that they had moved to a relatives. She was happy to hear they did so well.
Liam is tall and at the perfect weight. The doctor did ask if I was sure of his age lol. He is a tall boy!! He seems healthy but has some swollen lymph nodes. He got two shots and he is all ready for school.
Baby is 3 months old and weighs over 19 pounds! He is in general good health. The doctor was happy he was in a safe place. Baby is always smiles and coos. He grabs your heart quickly! Four shots and he was good to go.
Tomorow we have an therapist comes here for Liam.
Them I have the weekend with nothing to do! yeah! Well with the exception of laundry!

Adoption pressures

One last post before I go to bed. I have doctor appointments for Liam and Baby tomorrow morning.
Liam has told me that he would like us to adopt another child. He says that Baby is nice but he wants another child his age to play with.
My Little Man asks everytime I am on the phone with a CW "Did they offer us more kids? Are we finally getting a girl?" So he loves to be a big brother but he wants a sister now! What have we been offered?? BOYS! Only girls when we cannot take them. It figures.
So there are my adoption pressures. It all comes from our own children though haha.

Oh my oldest called us from CA today to see how things went with baby today. My oldest is amazing with little ones and loves Baby to bits. He wants him to stay and it is hard to get him to understand that no matter the wants he has the first priority is to reunify with bio-parent(s)

Meeting

I was 5 minutes late. Yes that is atypical of me so I felt terrible.
Mom and Dad were there. They were very happy to see baby.
They were very nice to me. I assured the Mom and Dad I was taking good care of him and he is well loved and does not hurt for arms to hold him or someone to smother him in kisses. The Mom said he looked really happy. The grandma gave me a hug and apologized for not bein able to care for him and thanked me for being there. Not much was resolved but the parents now have an outline as to what needs to be done. If they complete it , time will tell.
There is another meeting in a couple of weeks. A different type of meeting but same concept. Seems redundant to me but eh our tax dollars at work LOL
I can say that I am almost positive he will be here more than a month. But ask me in a month and I will let you know how that prediction worked out hehe

Oh and

I shout to the heavens thank you for my breasts!!! Now that you have chocked on whatever you were eating or drinking. I breastfed my boys. So I used what nature gave me to feed my babies. Now there is NOTHING wrong with formula feeding heck breastfeeding is not for everyone.
Obviously I cannot breastfeed my foster son. Two weeks of formula cost close to $100. OMG!!! And with all of that money can they put some toward research to make the stuff not smell so rancid? ::::Shudder:::::

Nerves

tomorrow is the FTDM thingie at a hotel conference room (that made me laugh and wonder "dang how many people are coming?!?!?!"). This is the first one of these I have been through. I want them to see Baby and say "Oh look how happy he is! Awww heck just keep him" But we all know that doesn't happen. I will probably hear how the parent(s) are going to be offered x,y, and z programs to help them or that the tribe is going to get him or whatever. I know parents need a chance to make things right but there comes a point where you have to ask how many children will go through the SAME thing with these parents? UGH Things suck simple as that.

On another note Baby is now a cloth diaper baby! he is so much more comfortable. The diapers he was dropped off were at least one size too small. So I will just send the Huggies along with him when he moves to the next family.

FTDM

Well Baby's meeting is on Wednesday. I am looking forward to it on one hand, just to know what the future may hold for the little man. On the other hand I Am not looking forward to being there with the bios since my last experience was quite mixed. As long as these bios do not harp on clothes I will be OK lol


Back to my drop off ot Frankie, Pierce and Lance. Meeting Dad was OK though he never made eye contact and stayed on the phone. Meeting Mom and Aunt. Well the low blows and snide comments got to me. The SW was in a meeting so left me in the room with the bios and the aunt. I was VERY uncomfortable and I said after about 10 minutes I had to leave. They were harping on me about clothes. The boys clothes. This wasn't theirs did you remember this or that? Then the comments between Mom and aunt that were entirely meant to hurt me. Aunt is an older carbon copy of Mom. I am glad to be rid of the family. The kids I will miss. The family I won't

I hope meeting Baby's bios go better. This state is pushing the fosters and bios meeting and communicating. Sort of a mentor program. They were happy that I was going to the meeting tomorrow.

Want a baby?

Move next door to me!!
Seriously I got a call today about an adoptive placement.... before you get excited, we said no. but it was 2 girls 2 y/o and 5 months UGH UGH UGH I need a live in nanny and another bedroom!

Baby's worker called me. He will be here about a month. Give or take. They have contacted the tribe and started the ICWA stuff. Mom isn't getting him back and grandma cannot take on another grandchild.
So there we are. It is much more laid back with the other three gone. I will have to blog about my experience meeting the bios. Talk about uncomfortable.

Poop!!

Only Moms who have had babies will understand how important poop is. Dang near an obsession!! lol
Baby pooped and almost stunk us out of the house. OH MY GOODNESS. He is lucky he is so cute because that stink was baaaaaaad. lol
He is much happier now whether it was becauce of the poop or because he is settling in I don't know.
I still haven't heard from his social worker. I have no clue what is going on with him or his case or how long he will be here, the family team decision making (FTDM) meeting when that will be, or any progress with the tribal route either.
Liam is much happier. I think the amount of kids was too much for him too. He snuggled up on the couch with me and we chatted.
he WILL be starting Kindergarten in the fall :) He may have a special ed component to it or an IEP but we will see. I am also waiting on the referral to UW for the FASD evaluation.

Well

having a little baby takes up a ton of your time. We are having (well I am) the hardest time with bedtimes. Last night was MUCH better. He slept two four hour stretches. But getting his TO sleep is a pain. I think he is used to sleeping IN bed with someone?? But because of 'privacy' I will never know. The babe is part Native American (Alaska native?). That will more than likely throw a wrench or at least a TON of red tape in any possible adoption. IF (HUGE IF) it goes there. But heck not having any contact with the social worker is a bit hard lol. I have nothing for him medical card, info, folder NADA i did get his birthdate and last name yesterday. Yeah I seem to always get these kids. A drop and go or here is the kid I will hope to get you more info soon. The only typical and by the book foster care placement was our ADOPTIVE placement LOL I can see where foster parent burnout comes from.

Tomorrow I say goodbye to my First three foster sons. It will be so hard. I am not looking forward to it on one hand. On the other, well eight children is too many! I love each and every one but with eight and the latest being a bity baby and us getting used to each other yeah NOT fun.

The news

I try not to watch it too much. First my oldest would obsess over the news and think everything he heard would happen to him or to the family etc. He is better about it now but I still hate to watch it sometimes because of the stories about kids. Much like this story which hits home because well not only am I a Mom but I have a child in my care around that age

http://www.kirotv.com/news/13529889/detail.html

Police: Lake Stevens Baby Dies After Pacifier Taped To Face

POSTED: 9:59 am PDT June 19, 2007
UPDATED: 2:41 pm PDT June 19, 2007

LAKE STEVENS, Wash. -- A woman has been arrested in the death of her 4-month-old son after telling authorities she had taped a pacifier to his face to keep the device in his mouth.

Bonnie M. Desmond, 20, of Lake Stevens, was arrested by police in this town east of Everett and booked into the Snohomish County jail Monday night for investigation of first-degree manslaughter, with bail set at $100,000, according to the jail Web site.

An autopsy was scheduled to determine the cause of death.

The woman called 911 about 11:30 a.m. Monday and said her baby was unconscious, but paramedics who rushed to the home she shares with her fiance found the little boy had been dead for hours, Fire District 8 Deputy Chief David Lingenfelter said.

The woman told police and medics that a half-hour earlier she found the infant dead and ripped the pacifier from his face, then called her fiance before notifying authorities, according to documents filed by prosecutors.

Prosecutors wrote that after the mother overheard detectives talking about sudden infant death syndrome, she indicated the pacifier had been taped to the child's mouth to keep the device from falling out.

She was arrested following an interview with detectives, police Cmdr. Dan Lorentzen said.

No other children live in the home, the fiance was not under investigation in the baby's death and both parents have been cooperating with the investigation, Lorentzen said.

Formula.

You know I am new to this whole formula thing. And bottles.... WHEN did they make so many choices?!?!?! There are nipple sizes? HA new to me!
And a side note. Formula STINKS! And no baby poop yet. But from what I have read it seems that formula babies are not as 'regular' as breastfed babes.

We made it....

through the night. It was a lot of trying different things to see what worked. Now tonight to see if what worked was actually right of if he was just exhausted and fell asleep haha.
Liams worker called. We are now considered his pre-adoptive family. If you could see my smile you would know how darn happy I am!! Grandpa called the worker so now he is aware of what is going on. He was not happy with the way it had happened at all. Then again no one is. But he is just concerned that Liam is happy. I called him this morning and left a message so he can get a hold of us. We are to determine what we feel is appropriate as far as visiting. For now we will start with phone calls and see how that goes.
Actually Liams worker had about 6 calls about Liam on her machine for when she came in this morning. Only one was from me. But the school, therapist (who is coming to our house for the appointments!), grandpa and the old family all left messages too. One popular kiddo haha.
Liam got sick last night and was so upset at himself because it was on the carpet. It took a lot of reassurance that I was NOT mad I was worried how he was and he kept asking if I were mad about the floor. Poor kiddo. You know it seems I get kids who are scared of making mistakes. They are all shocked when I say no one is perfect not even Moms and Dads

I wish

At times like this I wish I DID have contact with the last caregiver of my foster child! Here I am with a cute little three month old boy. But I know none of his routines. How does he like to be burped? How does he sleep? How often does he eat..... well you get the point. It is just like having a baby for the first time I guess haha
I cannot wait to see how long he will be here or what the darn situation is! I cannot imagine though what the family must go through not having the child with them. This situation is a bit different but still I was rocking this crying baby and I was wondering if the parents/relatives were thinking about him at that moment. I don't know it is hard to explain.
I may be updating a lot more if I am up all night with the baby so be ready haha

three hints

Small
adorable
and
that new baby smell

Of course a BOY! A beautiful chunky three month old boy!
We are not sure if he will be here long. but all of his other siblings are in care or adopted already.

Open

With Liam we will have an open adoption. The only contact he has though is with his grandfather. His grandfather has been the only stable force in this little guys 5 years on this earth. I am 100% willing to continue the contact with grandpa for as long as Grandpa is willing. Heck I simply see it as more extended family. Liam and I discussed inviting Grandpa to his birthday party (which is months away lol). I even discussed with his social worker (she brought it up) Changing Liams actual name. If any of his classmates were to find out his birth name he would be mercilessly teased for the rest of his school days. Anyway the SW and I discussed changing Liams middle name to his grandpa's name to give him that connection to his birth family. I think it is a perfect idea.

Weird thing I had a dream last night that Grandpa called. See Grandpa is out of town and has been out of town since before Liams last family kicked him out. Yes kicked him out. I see the way they did things and the motives as not noble or heck parental at all! Grandpa has no idea that his grandson is not in the place he thought he was safe and loved. I am not afraid Grandpa will want to take him from us. He has already been deemed 'not a suitable placement' for Liam. I guess I am afraid that because of this last family he will not like us or be slower to trust us. That make sense? Anyway I have had the urge to call him all day long. I do not want to until I talk to Liams worker though. Heck not even 100% positive he is home yet.
So Monday I will be making a call to the worker to see what is going on and if I should call or not.

On another note. The three boys Frankie, Pierce and Lance leave approx. mid week. DH and I have a running 'bet'. He says we will not make it to the weekend without a placement. I say two weeks.
My proud mama moment. Frankie won an award at school. It was for, courage! He really felt special and I think it is wonderful he was nominated for his classroom.

Something I forgot to mention

which is ironic considering it is about memory. Liam has been tagged with the "cannot remember anything" tag. As we are driving up to the DCFS building he asked if I was dropping him off there? Was he going to see Ms K? Was he going to live somewhere else? Would he get to see his birth mom and dad because it had been a long time. After I dropped the three boys off for their visit Liam and I went to buy army men. Which are impossible to find!!!! We talked about how he wasn't going to live with the old family and how he was staying with us. He said that he hopes so because he lived at X persons home, then with grandpa, then a persons home then the last home and then us. Naming each person in order! He has more in there. There is a lot to be uncovered with this little man.
I am now Mom to him, He gives hugs freely and always wants to be a part of anything I am doing. He is attaching well

More on our outing

Things went really well.
Here we are, Mom and Dad with seven boys in tow. When we walked and met someone new they started counting. I just smiled and said "Seven. Yes all boys" They we so darn well behaved. Seriously there were people there where there one child was being such a little brat. Yet here we come with our brood all saying their pleases and thank yous and excuse me's but having a wonderful time. They boxed with oversized gloves threw footballs and kicked soccer balls into this target thing. They ate ate and ate lol played on the playground and ran around. My bio boys the oldest two went on the alpine tower and the zip line swing. Not something I could give the OK for with foster kids....
Everyone commented on how great the kids were and how busy we must be. They asked if they were all ours. My answer is always "yes they are all mine" because each in their own way either by foster, by birth or (soon) adoption is MY child.
One lady said "are all of these boys yours by birth?" Ahh good question. Turns out she is also a foster mom ;) But to teens. But it figures she would know the 'right way' to ask.
The CO of my husbands ship said he was impressed with the kids and proud of us. His wife said she admired us. That is so odd. It was GREAT! But it felt weird to have someone say that you know?
I always get one of two reactions one is of appreciation the other is pity? Maybe distain? Not sure. These, negative reactions, are probably the ones who believe we do this "for the money" Which in itself is laughable. Probably the ones who have the visions of foster parents like the foster family in Antwone Fisher or something.
All in all it went spectacular and I am proud of ALL of my boys. Days like this make me want to go to places like amusement parks with them all.... then I come back to reality ;)

Liam

is sick. Poor kid. He is just so lathargic and well generally "feeling icky". The picnic went well today. But With Liam feeling bad he curled up on a bench with me or Dad and slept.
He is home now in bed snoozing away again. Poor thing I hope he feels better soon.
On another note my 8 y/o climbed a FIFTY foot tower today! He of course then Rappeled down :) I am a proud mama!!

Invading force.... or hoarde

Tomorrow DH's ship is having a picnic. My dh RSSVP'd for NINE. They thought it was a joke, or maybe an attempt at trying to win all of the door prizes but nah it is all our family. So we have to take two car... BUT I know the boys will have an absolute blast!
Everything from rockwalls, water balloon fights and bounce houses to a team building tower (rapelling zip lines tightropes etc) to of course food!
It will be quite interesting to show up with our crew! I hope to take a lot of pictures and all that good nonsene. I SOOO wih I could share them here!
So wish us luck that we get a big flat screen tv or better yet... a gift certificate for the commissary or a Costco Cash card would be a god send!! But hey I would be happy if all of my kid have a terrific day and behave the bet that little kid can. Hey I wonder if they will be giving away gameboy advance DS lite I have one little man that would be beside himself.

I make

him feel safe I think... Liam was in bed and came and said he sees vampires and scary things when he closes his eyes. The think of something happy trick didn't work so he came back. The compromise? He could sleep on the floor in my room. Within oh...2 minutes he was snoring away!

Is it odd

That the little ones (fosters) call me Mom? especially so quick. I understand I have three here calling me mom all the time. Maybe it is just trying to be part of the "crowd" or is it a need to have that Mom figure?

Relative search

It is the law that they make a relative search when there is a legally free child. Liam has had several relative searches. Each time one person stepped forward and expressed an interest and then faded away without any more that that. Since his last adoptive placement was disrupted, they, the state, had to preform another relative search. Today the CW heard back from the mystery relative who left a message Monday. She talked to them about Liams current living situation his possible issues with FASD. The relative then said that they were glad he was happy and that they will withdraw their interest!!!! They say he is a bit much for them,they are an older couple. Now we are just waiting for Liams grandfather to get home so we can meet him. he still has and will continue to have contact with Liam over the years. He is the only stable piece of Liams life sadly.

A 'relative'

I am worried now. some distant relative has now come forward again. He wants to talk to the social worker about Liam. OH MY GOSH!!! If someone who has "never met him" comes forward after how many relative searches???? and wants to take him in I think I will be sick.

The worker says she will tell this relative that he is in a home that WILL accept him and all of his difficulties and special needs. She does think that once the person hears about his problems they will say "no thanks".

You know on another note..... I was the ONLY one that has read his file that noticed his problems at birth?!?!?! The only one who saw those may be a leading contributor to his issues?

With the good

comes the bad as well.
Dh's Dad (FIL) has been in the hospital for about a month. He has gallbladder problems that went bad basically/
Yesterday he basically crashed and was rushed into emergency surgery. Last we heard he made it through but was still on a vent. Stressful crap.
DH and FIL do not have the best of relationships.... or even any real relationship in , what? almost 15-20 years? But It is still his dad. I know DH is hurting about the whole damn thing. And with the whole work thing he cannot get any time off to go to CO to see his dad. Last night he said he doubted that he could even get time off for a funeral! ugh

TAG

We're it!
We are the only family at the moment being considered to adopt Liam ;) I am STILL reading the file.
I do not see how people with children with more of a sorted past can cope with reading the information.
It is so hard to read that information and then look at this little boy you have who is happily playing Rescue Heroes and think of him going through those things. And you then wonder why??
So should we still be interested in adopting him after reading the record we are good to proceed with adoption. Like I said things are never slow moving here....

On a lighter note....
I made a promise to Liam. You know the ONE thing he wanted? Army men :) Not the big GI Joes or anything but simple little green army men. You don't think I am buying his affection by spending $2.00 on a bag of those little guys do you?? hahaha

forever

Yes it is true. We MAY be Liams forever family. The SW was happy with the way Liam was behaving and how happy he was. And before you wonder how I get Stepford children. He was NO angel haha but he was a typical boy and apparently I parent well or something hahaha.
I have his file to read. It is honestly about a foot thick.
Lord not light reading that is for sure.
However if we are still interested AFTER we read it we look like we are good to go. Who would have thought looking at a photolisting would actually lead to an adoption. WOW

Excitement

OK Liam has plenty of issues. But they are all totally workable. He seems happy here and is adjusting well.
Just knowing he is LEGALLY FREE is exciting to me. Knowing there IS a possiblity we could be his forever family.....
But I would hate to heat from his CW that the other family is interested in him and they are chosen or something like that. That would be one hell of a blow. tell me how is it that we bond to these kids so quick? I know there are kids I have met and don't really care for. It seems though that all of the children placed here have been a great fit.
Liam has a kindergarten pre-placement screening on Wednesday to see if he is actually ready to start school in the fall. To think the CW says they have "been trying" to accomplish this for months at his old house. Either the CW is exaggerating or the old home was REALLY dragging their feet.
Liam seems to do well with his letters and numbers etc. He knows his colors too. He interacts well with his peers too. So we will see if it is K in the fall for him or if he will be 'home schooled' for one more year.
You know too the CW said she wants a SAHM for his adoptive placement. DH said sort of a duh they (the kids) need that. Then we started discussing since that is a requirement for the adoption can that be considered as part of the adoption subsidy? Hmm Guess I should do some reading huh?

we venture

out today..... Some bad weather and an adjustment period has caused some at home time. So today I will take Liam and a couple of the other boys out for haircuts and get some milk (I still need that cow). We will see how he does. Liam has not had any sensory issues. No over stimulation or signs of under stimulation. But I would like to expose him to other situations to test how he will do.
I have been keeping a journal of observations about Liam. I will ask his social worker if she would like a copy of it when I see her on Tuesday. Does it seem strange I am keeping a journal? haha

Memory

Liam has some issues with retaining information. We know, well suspect it is from bio-moms lifestyle while pregnant and/or lack of interaction in the formative years.
He is doing well so far with constant remiders and our "eyes on me" approach (he has to make eye contact-though not constant while being talked to) He is also doing well when being asked to confirm what was said to him.
I think he would benefit from some labeling around the house. Marking the sock drawer with the picture of socks and the word for example.
However I cannot get them made the way I am envisioning them. UGH
I tried DLTK for a template but no such luck. That site is great for chore charts and reward tickets etc.

there comes a

point in your life when you smack yourself in the forehead for actually saying something outloud. When dh comes up with the online price quote for a FIFTEEN passenger van and I say "that is about the right size"...... Lordy we have a lot of kids. Logic being a 15 passenger van has more cargo space. I guess for groceries lol

one more thing....

I give this standard speech all the time. The speech is what our 'private' areas are and how we are not allowed to touch anyone elses and they cannot touch ours and if something like that happens they have to tell an adult immediately no matter what the 'offender' says/threatens. BUT that they are allowed to touch their own private area as long as they are in their private space or the bathroom but never in front of anyone. That is the trimmed down version lol
That is followed by nobody is allowed on anyone elses bed ever. This part normally goes over just fine. Until I got... "But you and dad sleep in one bed are you breaking the rules?" DOH!!!!!

Testing

Liam is testing his boundaries a lttle. What he doesn't realize is that I have been here befre. I have a child who tests us every day. I know the games buddy ;)

But really he is a good kid. Typical of a 5 year old....well he is about a year behind, so more like the behavor for a 3.5-4 year old but you know. Liam is TALL too as tall as the 7 year old here so he looks older and acts younger.
I am amazed at my 8 year old he is awesome with kids. He has tried to make him feel comfortable and all.

He has said he is not sure what he will call me yet. I told him my many names Gina Miss Gina, Mom, Mama, Mommy and he could pick any of those. He said he would have to think about it haha

It was hillarious. He is currently sleeping on the trundle bed which is basically a "drawer" that you pull out (OK so I am Miss obvious that is the defintion of a trundle right?hehe) but it is a twin bed. He looked at it when it was still under the beds and said, "If I sleep in that bed I will be squished!" hehe he was much happier when I showed him how it pulled out and that he does not have to sleep under the beds n a drawer :p

He is here

Little boy has arrived "Liam" is here and loves the dogs and all of his "new brothers". He loves the dogs too. I am sure there will be issues after this "honeymoon period". A disrupted adoptive placement is going to be hard. Poor kiddo. He will be so confused. Good news is he came with clthes and even his gameBoy! So no running out to get stuff for him. DH Will be home tomorrow. Hard to explain to Liam why dad isn't here now. He will fall into the routine soon enough

Hey for thse 'in the know' what are the chances if the family changes their mind and realizes they made a mistake that Liam will be placed back with them?

I must be crazy

seven boys here?? for two weeks though so not that long. Like I was telling the placement coordinator I must be destined to be the mother of boys ;) She did say she "owed me" and we are on the top of the list for a baby.
Frankie said that he hopes this new foster brother gets to be our forever son. Because he would be a lucky boy and we would be happy too together as a family.
My middle son said "Mom you are lucky that I am good at ths big brother thing because it looks like I am going to have to show another one the ropes" haha
DH has a family picninc day for his ship (He is in the Navy) I think he secretly loved saying "me, my wife and seven sons will be there" he did however threaten to buy a Greyhound bus to replace our family car!!!

Extension...........

GRANTED!!!!!!!!!!
Little Boy should be here by tomorrow!!

if anyone

says things in my life move slow they need to be slapped!!!
I got a call this afternoon Little Boy needs a placement. If they can grant an extension for us he will be here TOMORROW!! Things were going to be if we were picked the three foster boys would have laready moved and I would be free and clear to take on more children. But with his current placement ending so abruptly....well things change!
This does NOT mean we are picked to be his adoptive placement. UGH Craziness I tell you

TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We are now down to one of two families consdered for little boy!!! I am downright giddy. I have been asked to come in and review his file too :) OMG! Keep those good wishes coming!!!

WOWWOWOW

Well we are on the short list for a little 5 y/o boy. He is darling he has a messed up name.... some people name thier kids odd stuff lol. But he will be placed this month. It is an ADOPTIVE placement :) could I smile any bigger?

I got

Well I ended up getting the dark cherry full over full bunk bed with twin trundle.
I may hae it and have it up before my oldest leaves for summer vacation. If not well..... The youngest will enjoy it ;)
I got a bed rail from freecycle so I will have that for the bottom bed when I put it up. That way the baby won't fall out of the bottom bunk. He is of course too young for the top bunk.

Speaking of summer break... I wonder if I can expand our license for when my oldest s gone durig the summer? Maybe respite care or something?

and

As I am thinking about it more. I am more open to fostering than I was orginally. eh how things chage so darn uickly

Support

tonght I went to my first foster parent support meetng. It happened to be a training that introduced a new program that will begin to be implimented this fall. A foster parent bioparent meeting and possibly a mentor program. This should be interesing if nothing else. It will of course only be done with the sfety of everyone involved in mind. Plus this meeting is included in my continued foster parent training hours! Bonus!

We all had to go around intrducing ourselves. I was the second one up to the plate. I stated my name and that I have been fostering for about 45 days and I have 6 boys at home. Would you believe I got a huge round of applause?!?!?! Both for being a foster mom and beng new and six boys hahaha

I met our placement coordinator. She has me on her list of 'open homes' for when the boys leave. She said do not expect much of a break unless I needed it (my opportunity to jump in if needed to say "Give me some down time").
I will keep you all up to date on future placements.

In a few weeks we will have 9 beds and 3 kids. Depending on the situation they will allow the twin trundles to be counted as beds. well wait include the toddler bed, crib and co-sleeper heck we are golden with 11 lol :P not that we would EVER fill every bed with a child.


I also enrolled for the free online foster parent training courses. I will knock out my hours before I am due to be relicensed with no problem!