Pingo!

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Nah I didn't mean Bingo ;) Pingo is a calling card ( prepaid calling card provider) service. We have been through the whole virtual International rechargeable phone calling card service & calling card thing with dh being in this or that country tryng to call home. We had one card once that was usable for about 5 minutes because the fees ate up all of the money on the account. Talk about a pain in the butt. It seems that so many companies have a hidden agenda or fine print to just take all of your money. From what I have seen Pingo is pretty good. Add onto that an affiliate program that pays you what? $15 per referral? yeah that is a good thing

I almost cried

I know in this sea of testosterone I live in I was very close to being VERY girly. The reason is good though. Frankie told me "Goodnight, I love you" He turned around and smiled when he saw the look on my face (I am guessing). This is HUGE!! OK I will be on cloud nine about that one for a while.

Celebrities....date one... it is the in thing haha

Ok there are a few celebrities I would love to have a date with. I know I know "but Gina you are a happily married woman" I know but let's face it I have as much chance to date a celebrity as I do a meteor falling on our house. Slim to none... yup. I know this I have faced it. I am OK with it but a girl is allowed to dream hehe.
So I admit sometimes dreams do come true for some people. There is this site out there now where you can win a date with a celebrity. Every time I type that I think of the movie Win a Date With Tad Hamilton. OK time to reign back in my train of thought before it derails. Anyway folks can enter a to win a date with Actress, Mirelly Taylor who has appeared on movies such as Kiss Me Again and Serving Sara and television shows including “Las Vegas”, “Punk’d”, and “Numb3rs”. No SHE isn’t my dream celebrity date (sorry to kill those thoughts ;) ) I think she is very pretty and will make some fan very happy to be able to have a date with her. What an opportunity. I am looking forward to checking out the winning submission. There are some spectacularly creative people out there.
Free videos at GoFish.com

My Mom

She knew we had these boys as fosters. She is aware of us trying to adopt....eventually (probably not these boys but still...). Tonight she was sitting n my room with my as I was getting the two babies ready for bed. Frankie came in and started talking to me. We have chats ofte about almost anything under the sun. today it was about how the oldest is not 'the dad's' "born from him (his explination) son". How he didn't know because he treats him like hs son and how someone does not have to be related to love one another. Then we started to talk about God. Pretty deep stuff for a seven year old ;) anyway my mom was about in tears when Frakie was done chattng. She said how you can hear about the kids and know they are in foster care but your whole attitude about them changes when you meet them and see how much they thirst for human contact and interaction. She worked in the jails and in dispatch like I did. She saw/heard about kids coming vrom some crappy situations. But that first meeting to seeing them thriving n a foster home. so much different. She sees how they react in a normal... though busy house. The problens they are facing in attitude, behavioral,social and speech etc. She said she cannot help to be angry with the bioparents and what they have done to these kids. She equated what she was feeling with the feelings of hate,disgust, and utter disbelief of animal abuser on Animal precibct on Animal Planet.
She just could not understand why poeple do what they do

haha

DH was being proud papa at work and was showing pictures of the boys at work. One of hs co-workers said that the second youngest (Lance the youngest foster son) doesn't look like him, but the rest do LOL

I laughed and told dh I was sorry he had to find out ths way, but Lance was not his biological son. hahaha

It seems like just last month....

that I got my dear litle Frankie now he is SEVEN!! Oh wait I did just get hm last month hehe But he is such a big boy now.
Visitation with biomom and biodad today. They were gracious enough to buy him such illustrious gifts as a guitar and an electronic keyboard. I did draw the line at Frankie playng the guitar in the car like his biomom sad he could. yeah NO not going to happen. The went into the visits nice and calm (but yeah still little boys)came out the little hellions that first came here..... hitting and yelling ugh.....
I do have a huge gem for the day though. I made strawberry shortcake for dessert. Frankie said once he loved them. We put a candle in it and everything. He asked me "How did you know I liked this?" I said "because you told me sweetie when you first got here" he said with a huge smile "You remembered?" "Yes sweetie I remembered" to which I got the reply "sweeeeeet"
He ble out his candle and ate his dessert. Then came present time. Yeah I will never forget it. He got a TMNT toy, a book, PJ's, a towel and Pokemon cards. Frankie turned to me and sad "Wow how did you make my birthday wish come true so quick?" AWWWWWWWWWW All he wished for for his brthday was pokemon cards. But the fact I was able to grant his wish.... well that is just too darn cool and one heck of a memory for me.

the plan

is for the boys to be in foster care for 6 months....give or take of course depending on their parents and if any family member wants to take them in. One month has already passed....where does time go? There were times that I thought 6 months was forever. But it does not seem like long at all. I am not going to be OK when it comes time to say goodbye.
Is it bad that somewhere in the back of my mind I wish that they would stay? I suppose that is normal. I do hope though they do not lose their mom and dad. That thought is also heartbreaking. They do love them so much. I also know they, both the parents and the boys are going through much more heartbreak and turmoil.
Dangit where is that crystal ball when you need it?
I am still looking in our local paper for any news on the court cases. Nothing yet. So we Will see
I am still in limbo. I thought today about enquiring about two sibling groups but with the future uncertain I do not want to get my hopes up to be turned down because of our full house and not knowing how long it Will be full.

New one

Frankie told me today he hopes he stays here. He says he likes it here and he likes his school and his frends and...... 'the family'. Wow that is different. Not even sure how to take that one either. Hey it is all new to me ;)
Dang it all to heck I really am growing attached to these boys!

My mixed bag

Ok first to get it out there. I am late. Yeah "late" Enough to make me wonder. My body is way out of whack so who knows. Now that I posted this though I should start. No stick to pee on here or I would! lol Because as soon as I say anything about it or take a test I start.... I did tell dh a couple of days ago he laughed and said "it would be perfect timing and God has a sense of humor" yeah no kidding... With our house full that would be hillarious.
OK Pierce's first speech therapy appointment was today. The speech therapist said even from the evaluation he has made a lot of progress. We began to talk about Frankie and she said the same about him. How much progress he is making etc. So I AM doing something right and the boys are thriving in my care :)
On the way out this morning I stepped on a shoe left on the stairs and took a tumble down half of our stairs. Lovely if the lateness is actually something I will be worried. I know I sprained a finger and my pinky toe and I bruised my knee and hip. UGH I feel like a clutz! I also dropped everything I have touched today and spilled milk when I poured it (though I did not cry over it)
I deposited a check into my account last week and unlike me I did not wait for it to clear. I spent the money yeah well the deposit bounced! Setting in motion a chain of horrendous fincial blunders.
Good news. I got two weeks of reembursement for the two older boys! If that check bounces the state is in huge trouble LOL

torn

I am torn. I love these boys I really do. We never intended to do straight foster care. Only foster to adopt. But we took these boys in. I knew when takng them in that adoption was probably not on the horizon. Part of me feels that it was destiny that they came here. I was meant to help them (yeah corny work with me here).
BUT a part of me...that same part of me that browses available childrens listings... want to adopt and not have the uncertainty of fostering. Maybe that is just it? The uncertainty that is killing me? It has been a few days short of a month. The only thing I hear about the case is how uncooperative the parents are and how spun up she gets the kids during the very short visits. I know nothing else. Will they be here for the summer? Will they start school here? Will I be celebrating all of their birthdays here? UGH!
OK I am off to sleep

braved it...

I packed a picnic basket wth a dinner (sandwiches etc) As soon as all of the boys came home from school We got in the car and left to the beach. We had a dinner picnic down on the beach and the boys played threw rocks in the water ( A favorite of theirs). I figure dh is gone and has duty. What a better excuse to serve bologna sanwiches and juice for dinner ;)
I got my Disney store order today! Lots of PJ's in the washer :) The boys are all excited.

MySpace

For you foster or adoptive parents have you ever looked up bioparents up?
Not that I found anything really incriminating or anything but I guess I wanted to know more about where these boys were from. With all of the inconsitacies in their history or rather lack of the parents givng any well their pages didn't clear things up any either lol

Frankie :)

The boys has his moments. Having a child who has been that age with "issues" I see a lot of possible issues in him as well...ADHD, ODD mabe a touch of OCD. Things for him do not come easy and it appears that he was allowed to just 'not try'. Made it very easy for him to slip through the cracks.
I have been doing all I can here to teach him how to read and working on hs speech difficulties. My proud Mama huge gem of the day..... The second week he was here he could barely read the very first kindergarten reader. Tonight he read me 3 pages from the #14 reader! He did not give up or whine or any of that he tried and did amazing!
I told him I was so proud of him...gave him a high five and a hug and told him he was a smart cookie. He turned to me and said "I am a smart cookie! My other Mom never said that. She never made me read to her. We didn't do reading time. I am doing good!"
I tell you tmes like that melt your heart and makes all the uncertain times and times you feel you are being jerked around fade away.
OK now to tuck in the brood and make them all burritos (tuckng them in really tight ;) )

Costco and turtles

I know you can buy almost anything at Costco but a turtle is not one of them. But I will get to the turtle part later.
I went to Costco today. I swear I should own stock in Costco, but I digress. I had to pick up some dog food and all. The lady behind me in line made a comment about how well behaved my three boys were and asked are they your only children? When I said no she laughed and said "all boys?" I said yes.... she then said "I thought I kept Costco in business with my three boys. You are probably here more than I am". I laughed because I always joke about how I keep Costco in business and how they cheer when they see us coming :)
Now onto the turltes.... my youngest loves Lance the Turtle (from Veggie Tales) Hmmm maybe loves is a bit of an understatement.... he is obsesed with him. He has this one shirt with a cartoonish turtle that is similar to Lance the Turtle. He loves to wear that shirt in the 2 year old I demand to wear this shirt every day type of way. Well the dang shirt is falling apart and I cannot find one similar. It looks like this shirt will have to fall into the laundry abyss and never return. It will be a rough few days...

no records no dentist

BioMom....well she has her issues, obviously or her kds wouldn't be in care, but she has been less than forthcoming with the workers. She has turned over little to NONE of the information requested.
I go to take the boys to the dentist as they needed for their CHET evaluation. One problem I know next to nothing about their health history. Something that has not been provided as requested. So I could not fill out their health histories and with this dentist (one of the very few that take the state insurance) since I couldn't fill out their histories the dentist would not see them. How frustrating is that?
oh and Yes I am writing down and submitting the milage for the wasted trip to the dentist.
On another note the biomom loved her "Mother's" Day present. Maybe that can be the swift kick/incentive she needs to get her ducks in a row you know?

Funny

My little man caught sight of my book The Five Love Languages. He looked at me and said "ummm Mom I thought there was only one love language. French"

IEP

Well Pierce is ofcially enrolled in an IEP. The write up was wondefully done. I am mang a copy to give to the case worker and the CHET evaluator. CHET is child health and education tracking. Basically to asses where the kids are and what their special needs may be. With the IEP he is now enrolled with the school district. So he is set for kindergarten next year.
We also went down to the beach and the two youngest spent their time trowing rocks into the water. Pierce and I searched for baby crabs under rocks and tried to find the bad eagles. We found baaby crabs and he was so excited. He thought they were cool and he had a blast.
I want to get Lance into preschool too but the classes start in Sept. The registration requires a $50 NON-refundable depost. $50 is not a fortune but it can be a hit to the pocket book should the boys not be here. I hate the not knowing if you cannot tell from the tone of my recent posts ;)
Maybe I will "ask" in a round about way if I should plan on them being here this fall.

random thoughts

Well tomorrow is Pierce's IEP evaluation. This should be "fun" haha. Actually this school os really good so I have little to worry about. I guess I am nervous for him?
On another note....keep in mind honestly I am doing my best to be supportive to bioparents... All of their belongings reek of igarette smoke. Now I swear it is all in my house. And who in their right mind (I may have typed the key there....) writes "Pimp daddy loves you" on the back of a picture to their kids? Maybe I have officially hit that milestone of I am old but pimp daddy???
my dh has almost completed our storage shed. You know I think he started it to escape a house with six boys.... but you know what? If that is all it takes to get projects done..hahaha

What

so what am I entitled to know about these boys and their case?
Like court dates? Case plans? Maybe I just want the gossip of the case? who knows lol
But I know nothing.
I feel so darn apprehensive even letting Frankie hand out his birthday invites! Not knowing how long they will be here

argh

no I am not celebrating talk like a pirate day early or anything. It has been a long frustrating and trying day. Two of the kids were fighting at all times. My two year old bit the other two year old and I had to call the SW because it left a mark on FS#3. I felt like tar, I still do. I am just up to the brim with stress. I a seriously calling it a night. The dishes will wait. The laundry can wait I am done.
The good news is the the FS's did NOT fight one bit durig the visit!! They got spun up and loud but no hitting! I had a talk with them right before they went in for visitation and talked with the SW and told her what I had said.

one more thing

I want to say how amazing our biosons are being. They love being big brothers and they ar e so loving. I was unsure how they would treat the foster kids and react to them. the worst I am getting is the whole not enough elbow room at the table thing haha but that is it.

Huge Gem

Frankie came up to me a few times today and threw his arms around me and gave me hugs :) He has been warming up more and more and getting used to not having to be in charge of everybody. I am very proud of him (and all my boys ;) )

Vent...

I was told last visit that DSHS would be arranging a transportation service for the kids. They are paying me per mile as it is so what is the difference. So I went the week waiting on the phone call about visitation. I talked to the SW a few times no mention of the visit. OK Mom amd Dad have been flaky.... I assumed that hey no visitation this week. So today I go to take my laptop in for repair. The shop they have doing the warranty service is about 70 miles away. So this morning I pack up the three non school aged kids and we hit the road. I am driving through Seattle and the worker calls saying "are you bringing them to visitation today?" "UMM no I heard nothing, I assumed there was no visitation So I am running my errands I have to today". End of story right? Yup she said so too. Tomorrow I will bring them in for a visit.
But I swear they need to reschedule visits because of the oldests preformance and how far he is behind in school.
OK Vent off

small step?

or maybe a huge leap?
Frankie came to offer me a hug I did NOT have to ask for one. This is the first time he has done this. The first few days I would offer he would refuse I would tuck him and and leave it at that. Today he came up to me and gave me a big hug. Ahhh good feelings.
Lance gets the giggles when DH makes him into a burrito at night (tucks him in). These giggles are so precious so contagious!! Then Pierce starts to giggle and says "Me next!!!"
It is funny they call us The Dad and The Mom. Reminds me of that ugly little dinosaur "not the momma" They ask about their other mom and dad now. Not too often but I reassure then that mom and dad do miss them and they are happy they are safe and being good (ok maybe I throw in the being good part haha)

I told

dh that I made that huge decision today. He looked at me and I could tell he knew it hurt me to say I wouldn't take the baby. But he looked me in the eyes and said "We need to keep familes together" I know he was and is on the same page as I am. Trust me it is a tough decision. But to have the option of taking the baby and having them remove a foster child or just leaving the boys together.... I will leave the boys together. Luckily dh feels the same.
Now if the social worker will call me eventually to let me know when the parental visitation will be. Maybe they will not have a visit this week?? I need to talk to the sw and get her to schedule visits around Frankies school. He is simply struggling too much to miss school. But that is another vent I suppose

Certifiable

In an effort to make things easier and keep these boys together. I TURNED DOWN placement of baby girl!
Part of me wants to cry....no sob. But no I turned down the placement to keep these siblings together. Why did I have to? No one could agree on it, it being the license exception. The placement coordinator would have fought for the exception had I wanted her to.
Part of me is OK with it all though. I really do love these boys and I think we can help them a lot.
I always said I was not up for straight fostering. That I couldn't handle it at all. I didn't WANT to have kids for the unknown amount of time. Yet here I am doing just that and passing up a newborn adoptive placement??? What is wrong with me?!?!?

having six children

justifies making a whole turkey for no special occasion on a Tuesday night!! haha I even have leftovers ;) So I can spread it out to make dinner tomorrow turkey braid it is ;)

Polly

wanna cracker!!
Seems that our little Lance is quite the parrot! hahaFrom being told he had minimal verbal skill coming into care he has made a lot of progress at his other foster home

Education

I warned you I would get to this today, so here it goes.
I did not go to college. Of the many excuses...let's just say life got in the way. I stress to my children how important schooling is. THAT is their one job. Do well in school. However that means I, as a mom, have to do my part too. If it is being supportive, reminding them to do their work, setting reading time every day, going to school events, encouraging activities that they are interested in and introducing new things.
The oldest foster son is the only one in school. I got some belongings of his which included his school backpack. It was full. Full of what? Incomplete school work. Some half started some never done. FULL I am not saying a day worth of work..... weeks of work...if not months.
At school he is at the end of the first grade year. He is preforming at a beginning kindergarten level. It makes me sad it does. IF he is here the beginning of the next school year, should I ask (or can I) that he be held back a year? Well we are starting an IEP for both him and his brother so I can hope that it is enough intervention that we can help them catch up.
It frustrates AND angers me that a parent can care so little that a little kid is so far behind, not due to intellectual inability but rather lack of parental involvement

May is

Foster parent/family appreciation month so go and hug a foster parent or something haha

I got it

I found a 'retired' Wilton cake pan for Frankie's birthday!!! OK the cake pan isn't for his birthday BUT I will be able to bake him the coolest cake I hope he has ever had!! The cake pan is the Pikachu (Pokemon) one. Is it bad I am excited I found one? haha OK Off to bed now I swear!!!

Tomorrow you all will hear my vent about lack of parental involvement in education....

Lance

is here :) I picked him up this afternoon. He is mostly potty trained (YEAH!!!) He is closer to three than two, the same size as my just two year old. He seems so darn happy to be with his brothers. Mini-man looked at Lance when he was in his bed and looked at me with that questioning what the heck pose and said "Mama mo ya-ya?" Which is miniman speak for "Mom MORE brothers??"
So I have my little one on my lap now snoring. Which is no litle feat for a big two year old haha. Lance and Pierce are happy as can be to be together again and also sharing a room. Miniman would normally be in there too but he has not felt well today.
Tomorrow DH is picking up a stroller for me I got on Craigslist. double stroller. I figure that you know, I will need it one way or another.
That is it for now. I am putting a load of diapers in the wash and going to sleep. I start tomorrow off as the mom of SIX boys!

Carseats

The car is now at carseat capacity! That is just funny to think about. But I may be able to fit one more seat in there but it wouldbe pushing it.
I seriously need to start a PayPal donation account for a larger vehicle hahahaha
I have NO clue as to when I should expect reimbursement for the boys. See how prepared I was to do foster care?? hahaha I am just happy I have their medical coupons you know?? Starting them in speech therapy and counseling and the cavities that were left unchecked..... well it all keeps me busy busy busy.
Still waiting on news of baby girl. Though I have a feeling, somewhere in the back of my mind, that things are not going to work out with her. Maybe 'too good to be true' jitters?

Sibling #3

will be here Tuesday evening barring anything unusual. I am really looking forward to it and I am nervous as heck! Six boys in the house? That will be a change. Six kids. Well I have always wanted a large family. This is one way to jump in with both feet.
Cute story. Pierce is sleeping with a Pokemon blanket that Baggage got my two older boys years ago when she was in Japan. You all should have seen this little boy. He laughed and giggled because he was using "The coolest blanket ever". It is nice to see him so happy and carefree and his biggest concern is the cool blanket he is using that night :)
Talking with their social worker, she said there was a marked difference between when I was with the boys and when I left them. So it appears that the structure and clear rules I have given them is woking.
I got all the paperwork in the mail today to fill out for the boys. The same things Bio-mom left behind. I am almost done and they will be back in the mail on Monday. Really not that hard but very complete. Unfortunately I cannot answer their birth weight or the pregnancy info.
The rooms are rearranged for FS#3. DH laughed and said I was really good at playing "Bedroom Tetris" to make everyone fit where they needed to be and comfortable :)

I love him

I got ahold of dh via email and he said "we will take the 2 y/o in to keep the family together" No questions no reservation no second guessing just yes. Seems he feels like I do that these boys need to be kept together.
That man has a huge heart. I knew there was a reason I married him ;)

Funny things didn't work out with us getting the B boys and here I am with three more boys in the house anyway. Things all have a reason for working the way they do......

Frustration

You know I want to say first off I am trying my best to be a supportive foster mom. I love the boys and I am helping them with their school etc. I give the mom colorings the boys do and pictures I tell the boys Mom and Dad love them even though they never ask.....
But it frustrates me....close to angers me, when I hear how Mom is not complying with things to get her boys back. Leaving paperwork behind refusing to talk to sw's etc. Why? Seriously you would think she would be bending over backwards to get the boys back. Par for the course? Will she ever get her butt in gear? ugh
OK back to watching Happy Feet with my penguin obsessed brood hehehe

Call me CRAZY

We may be taking in the brother of the two boys!! SIX kids??? That would bring the ages of the boys here to 12, 8, 6 5, 2 and 2!!
The baby (2y/o) has a placement ONLY until next week. Then he will be thrown back into the shuffle. Is it bad that I want to keep these boys together??

eta: they are granting an exception to license us for one more for when the baby girl is born should we take in the 2 y/o

I said no

The 3 and 4 y/o. The 3 y/o would be a great fit. The 4 y/o might be much harder to work in our family. If these two were our only two we could do it. But it just won't work as part of our larger family. It is so hard to say no.

hmm

Well the visit ran long... it went well I suppose. I left. Went in the back door dropped the little ones off saw their little brother (What a cutie pie!!) and left. I got a suitcase with their clothes and a letter for the boys and...... one for me. It was nice to be honest. To see a letter from a mom who is going through what she is going throug. It was nice. She addressed it to "Our extended family". Now I do not see us having BBQ's and all together or anything but it was touching.
It is funny in her letter it mentioned letting them draw pictures etc and I had sent them with pictures they drew for their parents. They also took well to the picture I took and sent with the boys. I hope they understand I love their boys like my own and I am treating them well.

Maybe

I am not cut out for foster parenting. I am working with these boys and on a daily basis they are improving. Their interaction with one another, their manners, their speech everything is getting better all the time. Yet in the back of my mind I wonder how much effort I am putting into their development and trying to catch them back up and wondering if it will even last a day or two after they get home? Is all this "effort" for nothing?
I see SO much potential in these boys. I suppose if I can leave just a little impression and rub a little bit of good influence off onto them it is worth it right? Please tell me I am right?
I am hoping that things go well tomorrow. I have prepared the boys saying we are probably going to see their mom and dad. The oldest said "you mean my other ones?". But I said the probably because if mom or dad flakes I don't want them to blame them or to be mad at me for not producing them you know? But I printed out a picture I took here for biomom and biodad. I hope that is OK.
Man it sucks to be new lol

updates

Baby girl is not born yet. Some things make me want the WHOLE story of this little unborn one and her mother. That will come though

The 3 y/o and 4 y/o. I got their placement, child information sheets. Gave me enough information that I know I will need to discuss the possibility with DH in depth. Lots of things we have to discuss on that one.

Good news. I officially got our liense. Yeah it is dated last week the DAY that we took in Frankie and Pierce. haha

I got a call from our official placement coordinator out of the 'local' office. She was introducing herself and all.
So there is my day!!

Tomorrow morning/afternoon We have the first parental visitation. Lord help me. I am nervous!!

Aaaaaaand the potential

placements keep rolling in. Today I got an email about a 3 y/o girl and a 4 y/o boy. These would be adotive placements.

May I vent

We got Frankie and Pierce the day after they were taken from their home. They have a younger brother. He (the brother) was taken that first night into another foster home. The older boys, my boys were placed with an emergency placement for one night then here.
Fine things happen and with emergency removals from home you may not have all of the information on the children. BUT I get the kids placed with me on Thursday. I am told their names and ages and given their files. So far so good right? Friday their worker calls me and says well the youngests name we gave you isn't his name it is this name. "His mom told us that was his name" The kids are insistant that no that is not his name his name is the original name we were told. I let the worker know "they boys insist his name is this" She says "oh the Mom may be wrong" WHAT?!?!?! The mom doesn't know for sure?? Oh man. That gives me warm fuzzies.
So you know what? We call the little one by the name he says is his.
Yet all of our paperwork and his medical card (which I got Aprils and Mays in the mail today) has his original name we were given not the name his mother says is his name. Confused yet?? haha

Thursday

That is our first visitation. OY!
Frankie and Pierce have a two hour monitored visitation at DSHS. I wonder If I can take off and go run an errand I need to run?
Biomom wants to meet me to talk to me. The worker said by phone only. I understand why she does. Even with her troubles these are her babies. I am just waiting to hear how much I am ruining her children or something. Maybe I am being pessimistic though and it will go just fine...
The court date went OK The parents have lots of mandated "goals". In the court paperwork it also mentioned a visitation on a specific day next month. Frankie's birthday. So I am guessing we will have them at least until then huh? So I have got to prepare to have a party for Frankie!!! Maybe he can make some friends at school? Would a party be incentive for him to be a bit more outgoing? I don't want to push either
I do however see a Pokemon party in my future haha.
Oh I have the right to enroll them in whatever programs they need. I knew that but I was unsure
Things are falling into place that is for sure. Working a lot easier at home. I am more caught up aroung the house with five kids moreso than just three!! How inthe heck does that work out?? I guess out of necesity? Well laundry is caught up, dishes are done etc.
Well that is it for now

Sigh

I got the qustion. are you planning on keeping the boys? My answer "i know this; I will have them as long as they need me" "No I mean adopt them" Our goal here is reunification. that is what everyone wants right. Get these boys with mom and/or dad. But would I be a bad woman to admit that I would take them as our own forever in a heartbeat. I honestly love these boys and I am becoming more attached to them and they're settling in. I know I will miss these boys with all of my heart.

I got a call from Frankies new teacher. She said she never got a card on the first day with a foster child from the foster parent. I introduced myself and that I was his foster mom and my son is there at school should he have any trouble and need help he could help. It also had all of my contact info on it and said that I would be there for whatever is needed. She went over what he tested and that he was quite behind and we have a lot of work ahead of us.

Now to find if I can sign them up for school services like speech therpy etc. Being new to this is hmmmm interesting

Gem

Not really something that was said but the enthusiasim that it was done with. The boys LOVE doing chores, having responsibility and getting rewards for doing chores. We have them on the same ticket system the other boys are on. Do your chore get a ticket turn in a ticket to watch tv or play a game for 30 minutes. So far they LOVE it. So we will stick with it!

Visitation

Well they have a court date this afternoon at one. The SW is setting up an hour visit for Dad and Frankie and Pierce soon. Probably in the next couple of days. The boys being my first placement and this being my first cisitation I know nothing about what to expect other than it is in a room at DSHS.
Pretty specific no??

ummmm names??

We are tossing around girl names. I know we are trying to not to put all of our eggs in one basket counting on the newborn adoption working out. BUT even if we adopt a girl at a later date we would be asking.

We have narrowed it down to a few names:

The middle names would be Cecilia Marie. Yes two middle names they are after family and two middle names is a tradition

Our top faves....
Gretchen (nickname Greta)
Gwendolyn (nicknames Gwen and Wendy)
Gianna
Gillian

Opinons??

Gem

while at the store today Frankie says "so is this where you get all of that good tasting food?"

a gem

I figure to keep perspective on this whole thing at the end of the day I should post one positive event with the boys.
I am trying to keep to the positive side of this whole thing. Really the outbursts and everything. Who can blame them right?

Today's gem:
During story time Frankie and Pierce were very engaged in the story. Reacting to what was being read. They said thank you for the story as well. Their eyes truly sparkled while listening.

Funny

We were not planing on doing just straight fostering at all. I am wondering how in the heck I agreed to this haha. We were just going to foster/adopt but here we are just fostering these boys until their parent(s) can get them back.
Funny how things change.

Also

THANK YOU
to all of the new readers! I love having you all reading my thoughts and providing feedback. I am TERRIBLE at responding to you all but I promise I will try to get better!

better

since Friday..ONE fight. They have bickered and heck that always happens with siblings but only one fight. So much better. I may even brave the store with them again tomorrow.
I will be calling the 6 y/o Frankie (after blue eyes) and the 5 y/o He will be dubbed Pierce (he has piercing blue eyes)
DH has duty and is missing out on the fun today. haha But he is thinking of me I am sure.
I have gotten a couple of hugs today!! Huge milestone :) I also have a beautiful Pokemon picture that Pierce colored for me.
Talking to the social worker there will be an hour visitation a week. Maybe two one for Mom and one for Dad. I said if they work around MY schedule I could do the driving to DSHS. Of course I get paid for mileage.
Pierce is not in kindergarten. For whatever reason. I really think he is smart enough to be, and old enough . I called my friend down the street who is actually a kindergarten teacher at the local school. She is helping me gather some resources to help him and keep him educationally stimulated.
Frankie starts school Monday. I am anxious. However I don't think he cares much.

You know the other thing.... Does DSHS normally drop kids off without using car seats to transport them? The worker who dropped the boys off did not have any car seats and these boys are BOTH required car seats under the law. I have car seats and bought a booster so that isn't an issue for me. I was just wondering if that was "normal"

Some of the saddest things

That I have heard today
-"you mean I get more than broccoli for dinner?"
-" Here is the towel I used so everyone else can use it." "But honey we all get our own towels" "We do?!?!?! That's cool!" Said with the biggest smile on his face.

They ate dinner like champs. Seems they like everything so I was worried about nothing! I did let the pick out fuits today. We have one pineapple and several types of apples haha they love them
They got new underwear and PJ's and they loved picking them out!
The boys are 6 and 5.
The oldest will start school Monday! I am excited hehe. They have a lot of rivalry. They come to physical blows often. I have bruises on my legs from kicks and on my arms from pinches. BUT things are getting better.
I got another call about the baby today. Mom is out of the hospital. Walking around at 4cm dialated! Jeesh could be anytime. The worker wanted to talk to us about our willingness for an open adoption and all. Interesting convo. The baby may have been drug exposed in early pregnancy. They will be doing a screen at birth as well. Keep her and her momma in your prayers if you could.
No more time to update. So more to come after bed time ;)

How

...do you deal with children who do not know what they like? When given a choice they get confused
...do you get over the fear of running into their parents around town?
....do you get some of their favorites things at the grocery store if they can't tell you what they are

I was confuzzled

about the shirt comment I had in another post. Now I say "duh" as I smack myself in the forehead. I forgot about the footer picture on this blog! That is my litle ones most favorite mythbusters T-shirt. On the front it say undeniable Nerdy the back says exceedingly cool MYTHBUSTERS.

Talk about jumping in

We got our foster care cherry popped to put it crudely. The worker who dropped the boys off literally did just that, dropped and ran. This is my my first placement I am new to it all. I get a "here are the boys here is their 'stuff'. Bye" I got two beautiful little boys a change of clothes for one of them and their files. That is it. It made me realized hoe unprepared I was. I really should have had some underwear and socks at the very least. The oldest of the boys was ready to make his own dinner and do it all himself. He wasn't sure what to do when I told him that here, the mommy makes the meals.
Reading why the boys are in care. Well I am glad they were not actually involved. I need to come up with some cute nicknames for the little guys.
How long will they be here? we have no idea. Neither did the placement coordinator. Of course the hope is that they will get back with their mom soon.

Thank you to Baggage and her wonderful readers for all of their support. Dang now I sound like a Bartyle and James commercial.

The baby girl is no longer pending immediate delivery. They have stopped moms labor. The baby girl is due next month so that is a good thing ;) I will still be called by the workers or the hospital when she is born. I will have to head down to the University to pick her up. But it is all worth it.

eeeeek

Two boys will be here this afternoon for a foster care placement. And we may be getting an adoptive placement of a newborn baby girl as early as this weekend! holy moly!!
the ink on our approval isn't dry yet!!

finaly finalized?

Could it be? Well we can hope. After a couple of weeks and back and forths P and I are waiting on her supervisor to sign off on it. Her email today was it was still on the pile of to be completed she is hoping it will be done this afternoon or tomorrow.

This has been a pain! Being told we are good to adopt then well the foster care license wasn't completed. Then it got kicked back now we are just waiting... STILL
For a state in dire need of good homes they sure put you through enough waiting... but I understand the need to be thorough.

More reasons

Why we decided to adopt (specifically from the foster care system. these are an example why watching the news is so difficult for me lately.


Man beats 3 month old daughter

"man"rapes adopted dughter

And of course the story of the 'anniversary' of a baby found dead on the side of the road. No identification of the baby was ever made and the mother never found.

Done

P called today she is finishing up her part and it will be on her sups desk today! So things are getting progressed forward.
So now yet again. I wait. This is the longest and hardest "pregnancy" I have ever had LMAO

Got it

The last piece of paperwork needed to prove to P's supervisor that we are prepared to be foster/adopt parents. P is convinced, her supervisor isn't. P says she is wondering if she is actually READING our file or not. So that paper from my oldests counselor is in the mail AND in an e-mail to P. I OF COURSE made a copy for our records. One thing I learned. Keep copies of everything!

I can help them

My foster care licensor's supervisor (boy THAT is a mouthfull), said she is concernd that I may have difficulties with a child with learning disabilities. Why?? Because my children are "bright". Ummm OK do you think they were just hatched that way? Little pod smarties or something lol No the fact is I work with them, I read to them I did what I could to strengthn their weak points.
I have dealt with and I AM dealing with a form of dyslexia. My oldest and middle deal with it too. Chances are miniman will too. I have volunteered helping in the classroom assisting kids with reading etc
But yet it may may be too much for me?? WTF?

Cups

I picked up this neat cup called cupsicle. They look so cool....haha COOL gosh I crack myself up.

No go

on the 'B' boys. It is actually quite disappointing. But I know the perfect kids are out there waiting to become part of our family.

Ok not

too bad. I just needed to answer more questions and also get a paper about the oldest. UGH

as

I posted this I got a reply email from P she is going to call me in 10 minutes. Make anyone else nervous?? Yeah me too

Phone calls

I called the adoption licensor "C". C said that she was waiting on the foster license STILL from P. Whaaaaaa? I thought it was done?!?!?! So I called P and followed up with an email. I have a very bad feeling there is something that is going to get in the way of our pursuing adoption.

Nothing

I have heard nothing about the sibling group- the 'B' boys. They just sounded so perfect. I am wondering though what IS holding things up? Now as soon as I post this I will shortly there after hear something. It is just the way it goes haha

Poo

Well I was told that unless we wanted to go into the whole thing with NO reimbursements we have to WAIT to inquire about those boys! Why because now there is a delay in the foster license. Something we were told was already done. Ugh I admit it I am impatient.

The other

day When I was at Costco. Yes I now I have an unhealthy obsession with the place you do not have to tell me that. But I was browsing at the home improveement stuff. They had a really need plug and go alarm system. We have talked about getting a security system for the house have consulted with ADT and all but we are still on the fence. This though seems like an awsome deal. It is supposed to be the best in its field and the price is extremely reasonable.
With the Costco membership we can also get a reduced rate on the monitoring of the system.

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Well I..

made the first step. I made an inguiry about the sibling group.
So we will see.

Do we want to?

There is a sibling pair here in the PNW I have looked at. The youngest is close to my youngests age. The youngest has some muscle tone issues. He is about 12-14 months behind developmentaly. I have done some reading up and the muscle tone could be because of MD, CP or aoms other underlying disease. Not knowing the history of the child and the testing he has gone through I will not know. All I would have to do is get more information and I would know one way or another. Why don't I want to know? the turmoil of having to possibly say no.

No word

I emailed the adoption worker asking about a sibling pair we saw listed in Oregon. I still have not heard anything back. They would be a challenge that is for sure. But it seems like a little good parenting will go a long way with these two. I can hope we hear something back here soon. Either way really.

Little Man

The little man wears glasses. He doesn't have a super strong prescription or anything but he still has to weat his glasses. We have talked about getting him a pair of prescription sunglasses or at the very least some transitions lenses. There are a lot of stylish sunglasses out there and FINALLY they are starting to do some good things with RX glasses as well.
I keep stopping to look at Telescopes too. I remember having a cheapo one when I was little to look at the moon. I loved it. I know the little man would be charting the heavens in no time.

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Ohie Dokie

My mother called to inform me that she gave my phone number to a co-worker of hers. The story is that this girl is pregnant with her second child, cannot afford to raise another child and her boyfriend is a loser. This girl is going to the dr this week to see how far along she is and to discuss "options". My Mom let her know we are looking to adopt (though through the foster care system) but we are not able to pay large amounts of money as some do for private adoptions. At the very least if this girl calls i may be able to chat with her and talk to her about how to cope. If anything else will come out of it we will see....

lights

Part of all of this rearrangement around here has been replacing lighting around the house. Upgrading from the stock construction grade fixtures. I LOVE the new Bathroom Lights I put in my newly painted bathroom downstairs. It changes the whole look. OK I know the paint helps too haha. The upgrade to fans downstairs in the living room and our room was one of the best things we have done.
Now to get some lighting for along the driveway.... Or fencepost lights for the backyard. That will be nice


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well

In an attempt to find medicine I never actually lost (long story). I rearranged #3's bedroom. You can read about that fun adventure here Houdini The update to that? Yeah my medicine never left the van!! which is why I did not find it in the locked medicine cabinet I keep all of the meds in. Now what he ran off with? The thing I was SURE was my medicine?? I have no idea. But I can guarantee I found it by now LOL
Anyway back to the rearrangement. The kiddo now has bunkbeds in his room. The whole room looks SO open now. So I have the room to set up a crib should it be needed.

stress

The one thing about all of this anticipation and worry about the whole anticipation and worry and stress ofver the whole application and approval process does one heck of a number on my skin! I survived fairly well through teenhood without the constant break-outs. Though when I hit 30 life changed. No not THE change LOL but lots of skin changes breakouts and all. I try to have a decent skin regimine to try to keep on on things. The variety of Skin Care Products amazes me! Honestly. That site though has some great higher end products. .I really do think if you find something that works for you the costs isn't a huge deal (unless of course you are going way over buget). Finding the right product can be so hard. Once you DO find something that works, stick with it!

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I

made the call about doing respite care for foster parents. Our worker, You know I will just refer to her as C. Well thought it would be a great idea. Specificaly to transition prospective adoptive children into our home. Hey nothing like getting paid for a weekend visit LOL.

Foster care

Foster care. The mere phrase brings a bunch of visions to peoples minds. Most are or filthy little children with abusive parents, the kids being placed in a home where the alternative does not appear to be much better.
But the truth is quite different. Foster parents are here to help those children and be the loving caring home while their parents get the help they need A lot of the time that help also includes drug detox. To help the parents become well and ultimately reunify their family. We all know I can NEVER get into specifics here though.
Having a good detox program much like stonehawk could greatly help these parents and get their families back together soon


** this post sponsored by http://www.narcononstonehawk.comdetox

LeSigh

Well here I sit. Afte that first placement call I have heard nothing else. nothing. It is a little sad. OK well for me. I guess I am an instant gratification type of person. And I am in the wrong position to be impatient. I guess I will make a call todayand ask all of what is involved in respite care and could I get started on that?
Plus there are a coupld of children in Oregon that I would love to know more about

Shopping

Ok so maybe preparing for this adoption isn't AS bad as a new parent having a baby. I really do not need THAT much. Some things it certainly wouldn't hurt to have but if tomorrow I got 2 infants and a toddler I could survive until we could get out to buy whatever. But me being me and especially if I had THREE other little ones here I would try to get all of my shopping done online. Me being the frugal gal that I am I would use as many coupons as I could! Anyone who has looked at the numbers knows that the state reembursement won't cover too much. Since I have a registry at Target I could get a lot there :)


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I wonder

If foster parents ever watch the news and wonder "Is that child going to end up with me?" The breaking news a 4 y/o child SHOT their 3 y/o sibling with a .357!!!! By some miracle the child who was shot only suffered superficial wounds and will live. But OMG! they are lucky that is for sure.

anxiety

The more I think about that sibling group the more it puts my stomach in knots thinking about saying no. Your mind starts reeling and thinking about the what if's amd maybe I can help with.... It is rough. My friend Baggage warned me about the turmoil of saying no. It is one thing to hear about it and another to have to make that decision though. I am grateful to have a frind like her to share the been there done that with me.

Mortgages

Well it has come time for use to refinance our home loan. We got into this place on an 80/20 morgage. While not optimal we did well for ourselves over the last two years building lots of equity. Enough that we have ample should we choose to get a Home Equity Loan. We definitely made a wise decision to buy when we did.

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Teach me

to complain about things going slow. We got our first call today about a placement. They are a sibling pair a boy and girl. I talked for over a half an hour with their worker. I learned a lot about them, their past and their current issues. I am waiting to hear back from my husband so I can talk with him about the notes I wrote. But the more I think about these two and the more I want to take them in, the more doubts I have. This is hard. How can you say No they aren't "good enough" or too much work. I think it is more of my lack to provide the terrific home they deserve. UGH decisions. Hard

So

I will be setting up a registry or a few in different stores for a foster care and adoption registry. It is a little hard not knowing the age or gender of the child(ren). So I guess I will set it up for the basics we may need (if that makes sense?). I guess I need something to do to fill the time in my waiting to hear about a placement. Which is taking FOREVER.... OK it has only been a week LOL but still I am impatient right now :p

relationships

Things have changed over the years. Changing in the ways that fathers relate to their sons. Making being close to their sons, showing affection to their sons acceptable. I see it in my husband and our sons. His father, more of a standoffish, show very little affection type of guy. Now with his sons dh says how much he loves them encourages them more than criticizes them etc. Hunger and Other Stories by Ian Randall Wilson I read a bit of the book and it definitely has the same feel of the change in generations the change in the way love is shown. It was a decent read.


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Ummm hmm odd question

What exactly is the ettiquite on adoption baby showers? I mean a baby shower when you are pregnant is totally appropriate. But what about when the adoption is finalized? Is it OK to have a shower of sorts? maybe a BBQ? Is a registry OK? Or would a just celebration of the event be appropriate?

Payday's

You know all of my talk about money and budgets... Well we all know that things sometimes happen and we all need a bit to help us make it over that hurdle until our next pay period. In those circumstances where you have no other options Payday Cash Advance Loans can be your only saving grace. No shame in it. We all do what we have to do to make thing work!

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Waiting

I swear this feels like the longest part. I have had things to DO the rest of the time. The classes, the first Aid and CPR certification, the home studies etc. Now that I am done. Here I sit. Nothing to do, no goal to work toward. So I am trying to keep my house up to par and earn some extra cash. You may have noticed I am starting to post PayPerPost postings here as well. Earning a little extra cash will help balance our budget. Especially if our house goes from 3 kids to instantly 6 kids!!

OK

I will admit it. Getting ready for the homestudy and adoption I have been a shopping fool. For sheer convienence I have done a TON online. The trampoline, bedding sets and carseats from Target. Add on the 10% discountand I saved a bit! I won't even go into my new sheet obsession that I satisfy at Overstock! Knowing where to get some coupon codes is a good thing. And in my case it helps to convince the hubby that even when I spend money I am saving!


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Risk

You know We are adopting from the foster care system. We had to get our foster care license in order to do so. Just the way it works. Part of our home study was what we were willing to accept in our home. We have said no to... FAS, RAD, fire starters, sexually aggressive, abusive to animals, children who will not be able to indepentendtly live as adults, severe physical disablilities or immobilisty as an older child (all of our rooms are upstairs). We also stated we are willingy to only take a minimal legal risk. What does that mean? It means that we would like to consider children that are already legally free for adoption or are on the way there/"fast tracked".
Sure we are limiting ourselves a bit but we are trying to go down the road that we think would be best for us. But again we are HOPING for a sibling group so that does again open thingsback up. Now that everything is done, I wonder how long it will be until we have a placement.
Will we do foster care? Probably someday down the road yes.

Hmmmm

Well I may have went a bit overboard with carseats. I upgraded DS#3 to the Britax Marathon in Cowmooflage of course ;) I got a second Marathon in Granite (design) So on hand right now I have 4 carseats!!! One infant and 3 convertible (5-65 pounds). I should be set. My luck though none of the children that get placed here will need a carseat! hahaha So wish little babies and toddlers my way so I can fill these carseats ;)

Today

The adoption licensor called again. This time to say she had only a couple of more lines to write before our home study was complete! Great news right? Well that and she was missing a reference. One that had been sent twice lol. Good thing our reference CC'd a copy to me as well so I had it to send along.

so as of today Our home study is just waiting on a supervisors signature and then... we are official!!

weird

You know when the adoption worker and foster care worker were here I talked about looking at the NWAE website at the available children. Also that I was looking forward to our approved homestudy so we could look at the group of children listed on another site before put on the main NWAE site for all to see. They actually said how those children have so many more problems than are listed on the sites (we knew this) and that we should rethink those from the site. Basically almost a "let us hook you up with a better kid" thing. I don't know it is hard to explain. Just weird. Like they have a special stash of "better" kids.
The adoption worker has called us several times as she is writing up our home study. She is trying to write us up to sound the best she can. Which is weird in itself. But I guess in a way it is like a resume...but instead of a job we are applying for children.
Also weird small world type stuff. When I took our pre-service training, it was taught by two women both of which told us stories about their lives and children. Turns out one of the ladies that taught the class...well her son is our painter!! Small world no?? so he and I have been talking about adoption. He and his wife are foster parents and have adopted from the system. So it has been very helpful :)
Anyway it is late and I had a rough day and I am off to bed :)

Check

OK I feel better. I got a whole slew of bottles (thank you Freecycle!). I also picked up a can of formula. Let me say OH MY GOSH!!!! I never knew how expensive that stuff was! $12 a can?!?!?!?! You have to be kidding me? It is funny to be standing in the baby aisle thinking how much money my breasts saved me. That brought a whole case of giggles on.
Anyway with the bottles and the formula I will be set if I happen to get a late night or last minute placement or something until I can get everything squared away.

How many in your party?

Five. No wait 8 Ummm OK headcount!
Well the foster care licensor and the adoption licensor left today. It looks as if our home study will be approved shortly! We are going to be licensed/approved for three children.
So our family may be growing by leaps and bounds shortly. Cross your fingers and hope for an amazingly perfect match soon ;)

Wednesday

Both the foster care licensor and the adoption licensor will be here to do another inspection. We are doing really well at getting the house in miiaculate condition. My oldest though is on my list. He has a list(SHORT) of things to do. He left to go to a bithday party yesterday which is fine but then he called asking if he could sleep over. I said yes on the condition he came home early today. Well at quarter after THREE pm he calls and says he is on his way home. He gets home and cannot understand why we are disappointed. Or understand why he has "all of these chores to do in one day" GRRRRR
DH is off to the hardware store. A few little things we need. However it will be at least 2 hours before he is home. He has the hearth gate to install and book shelves.
But he is working his arse off to get things done which with his current schedule and workload is amazing.
OK I am off of here.